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Why I am not in the Ice Capades

Antioch Review, The,  Fall, 2004  by Walter R. Holland

We cannot all be in the Ice Capades just as we all cannot be lawyers
We can suggest valid opinions when appropriate. Say "thank you"

and niceties when it is expected. We can vote, sometimes. We cannot all
solve
diplomatic dilemmas or stave off death in the service of desire

or preach a religion that takes luck and pluck and fortitude. I wanted
to be an actor or a singer, but we cannot all be actors or singers
because

then there would be too many actors and too many singers and too much
acting and singing and few would watch or talk, though many would stare.

We can all tell lies however. We can hesitate to be sincere when it
involves
friends, families, or questions of appearance as in "you look good."
What does

that mean "looking good"? Whose good do we fulfill? Upon whose credo,
viewpoint,
recommendation? We can not all look good because then there would

be too much goodness and too much of a good thing is bad, it dulls
the senses, slackens the appetite, creates homogeneity.

The singular
is what Thoreau and Emerson said about the individual. We cannot

all be in the Ice Capades because the ice is already thin we skate on--
surface they say and surface it is. It sometimes supports very little.

Deceptive in its simple clarity and purity. On edge, we would destroy
everything, we would riddle the world with circles and curves--

only one person can balance above on such a little turning,
only one person can be on the cut edge, toe the perfect line.

But, oh, how we want to be more than the coldness
and all that discipline--we cannot all be. We cannot all turn out all

right.

COPYRIGHT 2004 Antioch Review, Inc.
COPYRIGHT 2008 Gale, Cengage Learning