Grief
Macmillan Encyclopedia of Death and Dying, (2003) by ROBERT KASTENBAUM, KENNETH J. DOKA, JOAN BEDER, REIKO SCHWAB, KENNETH J. DOKA, REIKO SCHWAB, KENNETH J. DOKA, NORMAN L. FARBEROW, MARGARET STROEBE, WOLFGANG STROEBE, HENK SCHUT, LILLIAN M. RANGE
The Special Problems of Disenfranchised Grief
Although each of the types of grief mentioned might create particular difficulties and different reactions, one can legitimately speak of the special problems shared by all disenfranchised grievers. The problem of disenfranchised grief can be expressed in a paradox. The very nature of disenfranchised grief creates additional problems for grief, while removing or minimizing sources of support.
Disenfranchising grief may aggravate the problem of bereavement in several ways. First, the situations mentioned tend to intensify emotional reactions. Many emotions are associated with normal grief. These emotional reactions can be complicated when grief is disenfranchised. Second, both ambivalent relationships and concurrent crises have been identified in the literature as conditions that complicate grief. These conditions can often exist in many types of disenfranchised grief.
Although grief is complicated, many of the factors that facilitate mourning are not present when grief is disenfranchised. In death-related losses, the bereaved may be excluded from an active role in caring for the dying. Funeral rituals, normally helpful in resolving grief, may not help here. In some cases the bereaved may be excluded from attending, while in other cases they may have no role in planning those rituals or even in deciding whether to have them. Or in cases of divorce, separation, or psychosocial death (a significant change in another individual or relationship), rituals may be lacking altogether. In addition, the very nature of the disenfranchised grief precludes social support. Often there is not a recognized role in which mourners can assert the right to mourn and thus receive such support. Grief may have to remain private.
The Treatment of Disenfranchised Grief
Disenfranchised grief is treated by counselors as any form of grief. The psychologists Robert Neimeyer and John Jordan suggest that the key to treating disenfranchised grief lies in analyzing what they call "empathic failure," the factors that limit support and thus generate disenfranchisement. Once the cause of empathic failure is analyzed, therapists can devise interventions that develop or compensate for the lack of support. These interventions can include individual or group counseling, support groups, expressive therapies, or the therapeutic use of ritual.
FAMILY
Grief is a natural reaction to loss and a deeply personal experience. Its experience and intensity vary among individuals due to a variety of factors including who the deceased person was, the nature of the relationship with the deceased, the circumstances of death, and concurrent stress. The process of working through grief over a significant loss takes much more time than the public generally assumes. Often it takes many years to reach satisfactory resolution of the loss. Resolution, however, does not mean that an individual puts the experience of loss behind; it means that he or she has learned to live with the grief and is able to move on with life even though life has been irrevocably changed and the enduring sense of loss will remain. While the experience of grief is unique to each individual, grief is also an interpersonal process. People live in intricate networks of inter-dependent relationships inside and outside the family. Dying, death, and bereavement occur in this context. Individuals' distress over a loss is an inter-play of their response to the loss, others' reactions, current and intergenerational family history of loss, and relational changes accompanying the loss. Therefore, grief can best be understood within the context of the family and its social environment.