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Bill Bennett forecasts the new baseball season.(PARODY)

American Prospect, The,  April, 2006  by Pierce, Charles

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Bill (Sportin' Life) Bennett here. You know, here at the Book of Virtues Race 'n Sports Book, we don't usually give advice on any game of chance that does not involve a handle. But it's time for a new baseball season, and since baseball's mired in a drug scandal, and I once solved the nation's drug problem, I have some insight here.

AMERICAN LEAGUE

EAST: A staggering array of decadent East Coast enclaves. I see New York hired a centerfielder away from Boston. That's like Trotsky hiring a speechwriter away from Lenin. The pick here is Tampa Bay--good, solid, and, ...

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