Travelin' down the SEC highway: adventure at Arkansas' four games on the road

Arkansas Business, Dec 24, 2007 by Jim Harris

YOU HAVEN'T EXPERIENCED genuine Southeastern Conference football atmosphere away from home until an 8-year-old in a purple LSU jersey hanging past his knees starts hissing at you and repeating "Tiger bait, Tiger bait."

You can take quite a bit of abuse from Oxford, Miss., to Columbia, S.C., from Baton Rouge, La., to Gainesville, Fla., as a Hog fan these days. Unlike the Southwest Conference trips into Texas--where Arkansas fans often outnumbered the crowds at SMU, TCU and Rice--you are seriously in the minority in the SEC, especially when you're among a fan base that begins developing their youngsters to hate you from birth.

In recent SEC travels we've enjoyed seeing Auburn fans parked right next to our SUV who laughingly fried a pig's head, put it on a spike and paraded around like savages heading to a sacrifice. We've had self-righteous Alabama rednecks with no clue about Arkansas compare the entire state to Dogpatch. We've awakened to a Knoxville newspaper that did the same thing on its lead sports page.

This sojourn would be facilitated with the help of Craig May, who has made 100-plus road games over the years. We coach our sons on a Little Rock Junior Deputy T-Ball team. Craig could be classified as the professional tailgater: always looking for the next big thing in SEC tailgating, bringing along the satellite dish and big TV (or two), upgrading the overhead canopy to double its size for the bigger parties.

The other third of our "core" travel party was Craig's dad, Gordon May, a swell and regularly happy sort who has had his fair share of Hog fun times and depressing losses but still returns year after year.

At various times during the road season, we would be joined by some of the regular crowd who frequented Craig May's home game tailgates: his brother Chris, who had a timely six-week break while he transitioned from Boston to Philadelphia as a TV news anchor; Dale Cullins, the master cheese-dip maker; David Rice, ace navigator; Mark Wagner, ace photographer, who nearly made a sale in Baton Rouge; and Chris Walton, road warrior and keeper of the "magic hat," the cherished No. 5 ball cap that this writer would don on two special days in 2007, at Ole Miss and LSU.

[ILLUSTRATION OMITTED]

This was serious stuff, mind you. Here's a sampling of the season. Maybe this will provide a road map for your own travels with the Razorbacks in future seasons.

ALABAMA

Tuscaloosa, Ala., Sept. 15

With Mississippi State on the road, nearby Columbus, Miss., and its $50-a-night Days Inn was the perfect overnight stopping point before a one-hour drive into Tuscaloosa. Of course, with this crew, every trip through Memphis at dinner time means a stop at the Rendezvous for ribs. Eight of us, traveling in two cars, chowed down on slabs of ribs and cheese and sausage plates. There was beer and lots of it, of course.

Tip: Shoot for 6:30 p.m. or earlier for a Friday night at the Rendezvous. We beat the rush.

We also beat the rush into Tuscaloosa the next morning, getting in at 9:30 a.m. for a 5:45 p.m. kickoff. We bought chicken at Wal-Mart, a radio to pick up the Arkansas broadcast on a 10-watt signal at the stadium and a case of water and we were off. Alabama had roped off the area where Craig May liked to park, so we settled into a nice lot off the University drag, not far from the Paul Bryant Museum, for $10.

Dish Network wasn't keen on giving Craig the new satellite coordinators for Tuscaloosa, but some flunky gave in--supposed it was "against the rules." Neighboring tailgaters were from Arkansas, so lots of folks milled around our TV in the eight hours or so before kickoff.

For the uninitiated, don't fear an eight-hour Saturday tailgate. Time flies. At Tuscaloosa, it really flies, because any and every football fan should spend at least an hour in the Paul W. Bryant Museum, which honors the Arkansas-born coaching legend. Bama fans sit in front of a large screen watching a Keith Jackson-narrated film about the Bear and Tide football. "If you watch that film and don't have tears in your eye, you're not an Alabama fan," one Tider loudly said to another on the way out the door.

Apparently, the fact that a lot of Hog fans weren't happy with their head coach had made it to Alabama, and nobody could understand why. "I mean, what do ya'll expect over there, to win the SEC or win national championships?" said one young Bama frat boy with terrible acne who momentarily walked next to us. "It ain't gonna happen. The day Arkansas wins the national championship is the day I turn black." Yes, he really said that. Civility and racial understanding is alive and well in Tuscaloosa--right.

Outside of that Neanderthal, everyone was civil and anticipated a great game.

Alabama fans aren't the loudest in the SEC, but with Nick Saban around now, there seemed to be a lot more electricity in the air as the game got under way. In no time, Alabama was ahead 21-0 and primed to score again. It seemed like Southern Cal in L.A., 2005, all over again. Arkansas couldn't cover a pass, and Bama fans were laughing and eating it up.