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Forget that forgive-and-forget stuff - Shape Your Life
Shape, June, 2003 by Maryann Hammers
Holding a grudge against someone who's done you wrong probably hurts you most of all, research shows. But how to let go of the anger and move on? A new study suggests that instead of forgetting, you should remember a time when you broke a promise, hurt someone or didn't do something you should have.
Your gut reaction is to blame the other person, but by reminding yourself of when you did something similar and justified your own actions, you may be able to understand the reasons for the transgressor's behavior," says Seiji Takaku, Ph.D., a psychology professor at Soka University of America in Aliso Viejo, Calif.
COPYRIGHT 2003 Weider Publications
COPYRIGHT 2003 Gale Group