Business Services Industry
FEATURE/Funniest Lawyer Jokes: Results of a Reader's Digest Challenge
Business Wire, Oct 21, 1998
PLEASANTVILLE, N.Y.--(BUSINESS WIRE FEATURES)--Oct. 21, 1998--Reader's Digest recently challenged visitors to its website, www.readersdigest.com, to send in their funniest lawyer jokes.
"We struck a nerve when we asked for lawyer jokes," said Tom Lashnits, assistant managing editor at Reader's Digest magazine. "Our readers sent in thousands of submissions. It makes me glad I'm an editor and not a lawyer."
Here are three favorites from Laughter, the Best Medicine(R) , in the October issue of Reader's Digest, on sale at newsstands now. For more humor, visit "Joke of the Day" at www.readersdigest.com.
-- An attorney was on his death-bed in the hospital. When a friend
came to visit, he found the lawyer frantically leafing through
the Bible. "What are you doing?" the visitor asked. The sick
lawyer replied, "Looking for loopholes." -- Contributed by Mary
Bann
-- Three paramedics were boasting about improvements in their
respective ambulance team's response times. "Since we installed
our new satellite navigation system," bragged one, "we've cut our
emergency response time by ten percent." "Not bad," the second
paramedic commented. "But by using a computer model of traffic
patterns, we've cut our average time by 20 percent." "That's
nothing!" said the third paramedic. "Since our ambulance driver
passed the bar exam, we've cut our emergency response time in
half!" -- Contributed by Paul Carreiro
-- Question: Why are lawyers buried 12 feet deep when they die
instead of the normal six feet?
Answer: Because deep down, they really are good people. --
Contributed by John Cordeiro
Reader's Digest welcomes and pays for short humor contributions. Four-hundred dollars goes to every true, unpublished story selected by the editors for the following departments: -0-
Virtual Hilarity -- computer humor
Tales Out of School -- funny stories about life in high
school
All in a Day's Work -- humorous happenings on the
job.
Life in These United States -- anecdotes illustrating
humorous or appealing sidelights on the American scene
Campus Comedy -- anecdotes connected with college
experiences.
Humor in Uniform -- amusing stories about life in the armed
services.
Contributions can be e-mailed to laughlines@readersdigest.com (remember to include your name, address, phone number and date) or sent to the appropriate department at Reader's Digest, Box 100, Pleasantville, NY 10572-0100.
Reader's Digest magazine is available by subscription ($24.47/year) by calling toll-free 1-888-DIGEST2 (1-888-344-3782). Reader's Digest is read by nearly 100 million people around the world each month.
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