And while you're at it … Here are six more suggestions for simplifying the rules book

Golf Digest, March, 2004

The U.S. Golf Association and the Royal and Ancient Golf Club of St. Andrews recently announced the most extensive revision to the Rules of Golf in 20 years. Although we applaud the changes, frankly, they didn't do enough. Scouring the new book, we found some rules they missed:

1 Hitting a ball out-of-bounds (Rule 27-1): Considering the snail-like pace of play golf suffers from, the last thing we need is a stroke-and-distance rule in which you hit a ball, walk 220 yards down the fairway, find that it's out-of-bounds by a foot or so, then have to walk back and hit another tee shot and take a one-stroke penalty for good measure. If you swing and miss at a ball on the tee, you lie one. But if you hit a good drive that bounces off a cartpath and dribbles out-of-bounds, you re-tee and lie two. To save time and anguish, why not treat O.B. stakes like a lateral hazard--find the spot where the ball went O.B., and drop within two club lengths no closer to the hole with a stroke penalty?

2 Dangerous situation (Decision 1-4/11): If your ball comes to rest near a rattlesnake, you are entitled to a free drop. Sounds fair, right? Well, if your ball lands in poison ivy, the Rules of Golf allow you to take a drop, but not without a penalty stroke. Who wrote this rule, the Marquis de Sade?

3 Water hazards and lateral water hazards (Rule 26-1): We don't mind a penalty for hitting the ball in the water, but who needs two types of hazards with different options for how to proceed? Yellow stakes are for regular water hazards, and red stakes are for lateral water hazards, and if a groundhog sees his shadow, there will be six more weeks of winter. Talk about confusing. Let's pick one color and one procedure for dropping.

4 Asking for or giving advice (Rule 8-1): A two-stroke penalty for asking someone in your group if they used a 6-iron or 7-iron on a par 3 seems severe. Hey, it's a free country. No one has to tell you what club they used. And even if they give you advice, you still have to hit the shot, and that's hard enough. A rich guy or a tour pro with a caddie can get advice, but a group of hackers must remain silent? Revolutions have been started like this.

5 Ball moving after address (Rule 18-2b): If you address the ball and then the wind moves it, you're penalized. On the flip side, if you haven't addressed the ball, and the wind blows it, say, into the hole, the ball is deemed to be holed. The elements are part of golf, but once the ball has stopped moving as a result of your last stroke, then nothing should affect your score until you make your next stroke.

6 Loose impediments (Rule 23): Icicles are considered loose impediments or casual water, but ice cubes are considered obstructions. What does this mean? We have no idea. What we do know is that someone actually spent time thinking about the differences between the two. Just a hunch, but this person probably has a sock drawer organized by color and tax records from 1985. R.K.