His Ownself: Dan Jenkins on pros, presidents, and when a funny line becomes a cheap shot

Golf Digest, June, 2001 by Guy Yocom

I'm rooting for him to make it back, because he was great for golf. Not necessarily an original--drinking, gambling, hitting a long ball. But colorful. A ticket-seller. One of a few.

The others being . . .

Right now? Tiger Woods. That's it. And the spectacle of the tournament itself. Come out and have an all-day picnic and get sunburned at the rich man's country club. Or come out and get a swing tip. But players? I think Greg Norman still sells some tickets. Maybe Fred Couples and Phil Mickelson. All the others, you lump together. Part of the spectacle.

How many majors do you think Tiger will win?

Two years ago I would have said 10 or 12, but now I put the over-and-under at 24. He already has nine [including three U.S. Amateurs], he's only 25, and he's proved there's nobody even remotely in his class.

I never thought I'd ever see a greater shotmaker than Hogan or a greater winner than Nicklaus, but I have. It's Tiger. Not that I still wouldn't want Ben to get the drive in the fairway for me for my life. But Tiger makes all those other slugs out there today look like they don't even know how to play. We're talking about a truly remarkable athlete here. Something the game has never seen. Only two things can stop Tiger--injury or a bad marriage.

You believe Nicklaus won for the fun of it, right?

Jack never played for money in his life. He played against the history books, which is tougher. Immortality is a lot tougher to play for than money. Tiger's already doing the same thing.

Did you root for Nicklaus over the years?

Of course. Aside from the fact that I became friends with Jack and Barbara, it made a better story. Bigger the name, bigger the headline. Human nature. When I was at SI, I was the guy who had to tell Arnold to wear a red sweater on Sunday, for the photographers. Surveys at the time said red on the cover sold better on newsstands. I always thought that was practically the same thing as idiotic, but I wasn't in charge.

Speaking of Palmer, he's described as being the same guy now as he was 50 years ago. Is that true?

I don't suppose anybody's ever enjoyed being who they are more than Arnold's enjoyed being Arnold Palmer. I'm fairly certain that over the past 50 years he's never had a single conversation about anything other than Arnold Palmer. But I know what you're getting at. Curtis Strange said it best in '89. He said, "I've won two Opens now, so I must really be smart." He got it. Most of the guys on the tour don't. They equate winning with intellect, rich with smart. Frankly, I think it helps the great athlete to be very stubborn and about half-dumb. That way he doesn't think anything is totally impossible--like winning a bunch of majors.

What's the biggest myth about today's pro on the PGA Tour?

You know what I'm going to say to that. It's the notion that the average players today are better than the average players of the '40s and '50s. Well, they're not. But they don't have to be. The equipment is better. The ball is hot. The courses are so much better maintained now. The greens are immaculate. They seldom get a bad lie in the fairway. They play ball-in-the-air golf. Drive it 300 yards, hit to a target that will hold anything, every putt rolls true. Lanny Wadkins has said, "We make six-footers now like we used to make two-footers."