Of mamas, papas and "big mamas": authors weave a rich tapestry portraying strong African American kinships. - five books on family - book review

Black Issues Book Review, May-June, 2003 by Suzanne Rust

4 Wisdom, the value of understanding history.

5 Truth, the value of being true to yourself.

6 Patience, the value of "keeping the faith."

7 Love, the value of living joyfully.

"She honored me in the way she loved me. She honored me in the ways she shaped my Character," Brown says. "And she honored me with her example of a life lived well. In everything she did for me, Mama taught me that people who chart their own course--in other words, people who are self-empowered--always have a destiny that is different from that of people who allow others to define them."

While this book is a tribute to a specific Mama, it is also an ode to all of those unofficial mamas, aunties and uncles who are there with hugs, support, encouragement, open ears and a hot meal when no one else is.

Grandma's Hands

Sometimes the best advice comes from those who have had time to step back and reflect on the world, those whose thoughts have had time to season. The sagacity of grandmothers is legendary. Dennis Kimbro, an entrepreneur and coauthor of Think and Grow Rich: A Black Choice, has captured some of that magic in What Keeps Me Standing: Letters From Black Grandmothers on Peace, Hope, and Inspiration (Doubleday, April 2003, $23.95, ISBN 0-385-50635-X).

For five years, Kimbro asked 1,000 grandmothers from across the country one simple question: "If you had to write a one-page letter to your children or the next generation, what would you tell them about life?" Out came pearls of wisdom that would put Maya Angelou to shame: "It's never too late to become the person you were meant to be. Let your imagination soar. It's the secret language of the soul" are the words of one grandma. And from another: "I am convinced that our actions on earth hold eternal life. It is up to each of us to determine whether our acts will increase the light in the world or add to the darkness."

From the Spelman graduate to the washerwomen, their words often hold the same basic truths: Give love, lots of love, and learn to receive it. Live life to the fullest, pursue your dreams and live up to your potential, and at the base of it all, have a very strong spirituality and a connection with God. None of it sounds trite coming from these women for they have been through it: the stings of racism, the births and deaths of children, good marriages and bad. They've weathered financial difficulties and personal losses and lived to tell the tale. What Keeps Me Standing is an uplifting treasure and a great source of inspirational quotes.

Quest for Freedom

Another book reminds us that families influence the way we look at the world. Those discussions at the dinner table, or that comment said in passing all feed into where we stand politically. Freedom in the Family: A Mother-Daughter Memoir of the Civil Rights Movement by Tananarive Due and Patricia Stephens Due (See BIBR, NONFICTION REVIEWS, March-April 2003) looks at a family that has dedicated itself to the fight for civil rights. The young Patricia Stephens was an activist during the height of the struggle. As a student at Florida A&M, she worked with CORE. In 1960, she took part in the landmark "jail-in," where students chose incarceration over fines for just sitting at a Woolworth lunch counter.