Renewal among the GIANTS

Leadership, May, 2001 by Jeanie Cash

Learning at the feet of some of the nation's most prominent educational researchers can be a life-changing experience.

I have a vivid recollection of driving home from the doctor's office one Thursday afternoon in the spring of 1992. Suppressing those "my life is out of control" feelings of anxiety, I was reflecting gravely on what the doctor had just said.

"Jeanie, your stiff neck, rapid pulse and elevated blood pressure are all signs of unacknowledged stress. You say you're not stressed, but it is showing up physically. Either change jobs, learn to take care of yourself, or start doing research on how to live as a stroke victim."

"What ever possessed me to think I wanted to be a principal?" I thought soberly. "This is an impossible job that no human can manage." In the past two weeks I had been the social worker, funeral director, marriage counselor, witness to a neighborhood robbery, volunteer coordinator and staff developer.

I was the principal of the lowest socio-economic population, the highest ESL population and the lowest performing school in the district. With a 3-2 board vote, the school had re-opened after being closed for several years due to declining enrollment. It re-opened with cast-off furnishings, some new teachers and veteran teachers who transferred there to escape other circumstances.

I was exhausted! However, as is the case with most administrators, I went to work each morning with a sunny disposition that said, "I am Superwoman!"

The morning after my trip to the doctor, the superintendent, who was a strong ACSA supporter, asked if I wanted to attend the first-ever Harvard/ACSA Principals' Center at UCLA during the month of July. Did I want to give up 10 days of my vacation? Did I want to room in a dorm with people I didn't know? Did I have the energy to sit through that much learning?

With a great deal of apprehension I made the commitment to attend the ACSA Principals' Institute that summer of 1992. The decision was mostly because I wanted to please my superintendent, and partly because I needed to re-charge my battery.

One of the readings assigned prior to our arrival was a book called "Improving Schools From Within," by Roland Barth of Harvard University. I was so in awe of Dr. Barth and his chapter that described his personal vision of the kind of school where he would like his own children to attend. It was this article that was on my mind my very first night at UCLA.

My good buddy and fellow principal had decided to attend with me. Not usually shy, we both were feeling quite apprehensive as we arrived at the reception that night. We timidly got our drinks and appetizers and sat off to the side of the larger group. The next thing I knew, a very handsome, personable gentleman sat down next to me and acted as though we were old friends. His friendly and witty conversation began to work immediately to thaw the ice in my tummy. He asked me my name and where I was from. After responding, I inquired about his name and work location.

"My name is Roland Barth" he said, extending his hand. "Roland Barth!" I exclaimed, in what I'm certain was an embarrassingly loud voice. I was actually engaged in a one-to-one conversation with the Roland Barth! As it turned out, Barth was the first of many "educational giants" I would have the privilege of meeting over the next 10 days.

The next day, as I was sitting in a small group with Howard Gardner discussing his ideas on multiple intelligences, I remember thinking, "I am at this moment sitting at the feet of possibly the greatest educational researcher of our time."

It wasn't only the educational giants who provided me with powerful learning opportunities that week. It was also my team leader and the other 100 principals who shared success stories and strategies in our small-group conversations.

On the last day one of my new friends described it well. "I feel like I came here an empty vessel," she said. "Now I'm so full, I'm overflowing."

The limited space here does not permit me to elaborate on all that two weeks meant to this burned out principal. What I can say is that this was truly a life-changing experience. I didn't just get a life preserver thrown at me; I got airlifted out of my drowning state. I returned fully energized and equipped for action.

Just one year later I stood on the stage with then State Superintendent Bill Honig, proudly representing my once poor, under-performing school to accept the award for becoming a California Distinguished School!

In addition to a hard-working, committed staff that was willing to get caught up in my new found passion and energy, I owe the success of that year--not to mention my health, my sanity, and my renewed passion to become the best leader I could be--to the ACSA Summer Institute

I have been back every year since, as an alumni participant and, for the last seven years, as a team leader. Each year I can't wait to get there, and each year I feel as though I leave having gained the equivalent of a doctorate in leadership and current educational research and practice ... and had a great time doing it!