Fab 4.0 - Humor

Industry Standard, The, Sept 25, 2000 by Ethan Smith

Found in a dumpster outside MP3.com's San Diego headquarters, hours after Judge Jed S. Rakoff's Sept. 6 ruling against the company.

mp3.com

Fax

DATE: Sept. 5, 2000

TO: Paul, Ringo, George

CC: Julian, Sean, Yoko

FROM: Michael Robertson, CEO

RE: Victory party set list

Lads,

Many thanks for agreeing to play your reunion gig at our victory party! (Yoko, Julian, Sean -- a special thanks to you for standing in for John; we know he'd love it!) As promised, we've got your fee ($100 million -- almost as much as that bastard Bonfman is looking for!) on hand in cash reserves. Judge Rakoff's decision is due tomorrow, and we're sure we're going to win big!

Not to be presumptuous or anything, but our board of directors wants to submit a few requests. Keep in mind, these are just requests -- you'll get your nine-figure guarantee even if you opt for the boring, old ... er, original -- Lennon-McCartney chestnuts over these Information-age updates.

Cheers,

MR

Suggested set list:

"Business Plan Writer"

"VC in the Sky With Diamonds"

"Why Don't We Do It on Sand Hill Road"/

"Fool on Sand Hill" medley

"I want to Hold Your Hand" (Incubator Remix

"Day Ripper"

(Employee-of-the-Year Award presentation ceremony)

"Eight Days a Week"/"A Hard Day's Night" medley

"Baby You're Rich Man"

"Baby You Can Drive My Boxster"

"(Dot-)Com Together"

(Robertson's Expansion into Foreign Markets" speech)

"Flack in the USSR"

"Here Comes Masayoshi Son"

"I Am the www.airus"

"We Can Work It Out" (dedicated to our friends at AOL Time Warner)

"You Never Give Me Your Money"

"You're Going to Lost the URL"

"Nowhere Plan"

"While My PR Gently Weeps"