The power of … "Thank you"

Flying Safety, August, 2007 by Dee J. Olsen

Many months ago, I was feeling rather burned out. I could not pinpoint any particular reason why. Like most pilots, being a "Type A" personality, I felt like I needed to figure out this puzzle. Nothing in particular came to mind. One evening, my wife must have seen my "deep in thought" look. She asked that key question spouses love to ask: "What are you thinking?"

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I explained to her that I just felt burned out, I couldn't really think of any particular reason why, and this frustrated me. Trying to help out, she started asking questions about what it could be. "Is it something here at home?"

"No, it's definitely something at work."

"Is it the ops tempo?" (Yes, my wife does talk like this, she's a pilot too. You can imagine some of the dinner-time conversations we have.)

"No. Things are busy, but they've always been busy in this squadron."

"So, you don't think you're flying too much?"

"No, there have only been a couple times in my career that I've ever felt like I was flying too much."

"Are you frustrated with your squadron?"

"No, I enjoy the people in the squadron, and accomplishing our mission gives a very rewarding feeling." After such a cheesy answer, she must have sensed there was something more to it. So she dug a little deeper: "Are you burned out on your current job in the squadron?" "Well, it certainly can be aggravating at times, but I don't feel burned out on the job itself. In fact, I feel like I'm really good at it. There have been some situations lately that have appeared like they were going to go poorly, but I was able to turn them into some win/win situations."

"Do you feel like you're not appreciated?" Wow. She really hit it. She didn't ask if I felt like I was being recognized for my work, or if I felt like I deserved some medal to put on my uniform. She asked if I felt like anyone had noticed the effort that I made. At first I was not even sure if I wanted to admit the answer to her, let alone myself. "Yes, I think that's what it might be. I feel like I'm working my tail off, and I'm not sure if 'the leadership' notices or cares."

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She had helped me to realize that I was just in need of a sincere "Thank you." Now, you may be thinking that this is a bunch of touchy-feely stuff, and it may be. Whether or not it's touchy-feely, doesn't change the fact that we, as humans, do have a certain need to feel appreciated for an honest effort toward a worthwhile cause.

When I played football, I was an offensive lineman. I enjoyed playing the position because of the hard work that was required on every play. I wasn't interested in the high visibility or recognition that came along with the so-called "skill positions." However, there was always a great feeling of satisfaction when someone in one of those skill positions privately showed appreciation for what I had done. It was also great motivation to continue what I was doing right and put forth the extra effort required to excel.

You also may be thinking, "It's your job, it's your duty, you're supposed to do it, and you're supposed to do it right. There's no need to thank you for just doing what you're supposed to do." It's okay if you think that, but you might miss out on a valuable tool to put in your leadership toolkit.

A few days later, I was thinking the same way and tried to see it from a different angle: "Why should anyone, especially my supervisor or squadron leadership, thank me for just doing my job, for just doing my duty?" This led me to think. "Why should I expect thanks from anyone higher ranking than me, if I don't provide the same for those who are subordinate to me?"

Until that point, I believe that I had been polite, and given a courtesy "Thank you" to those I worked with. (My mother had succeeded in teaching me some manners.) However, everyone can say "Thank you." In many cases, people can easily recognize whether or not it's sincere or just going through the motions.

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I decided to do an experiment. If I felt like I could use a sincere "Thank you" for just doing the job I do every day, what would be the result if I expressed a sincere "Thank you" to those around me and especially to those subordinate to me? The key is that you have to show you're sincere in your thanks. How you express sincere appreciation can be as unique as your own personality. It may be very difficult to identify what it takes, but everyone can easily spot when it's not there.

As my experiment progressed, I tried it with everyone: superiors, subordinates, aircrew members, crew chiefs, maintainers, etc. The results would seem obvious; I received a positive reaction from everyone. What I didn't expect was the remarkable reaction from the lower enlisted ranks. This is the group that I figured would have the perception, "What does this bald old Captain know about me? He doesn't know anything more about me than my teachers in high school."

I did find that in our current Air Force culture of doing more with less, everyone is scrambling just to accomplish their basic jobs, plus all of their additional duties. When someone acknowledges and shows sincere appreciation for another's effort, it increases their sense of ownership for their work. More importantly, in our busy Air Force world, it can be a great motivator to continue doing the job right, and put forth the extra effort required to excel.