Listen up! Now hear this: you can be the all-ears gal everyone wants to befriend

You love to talk, don't you? But how well do you rate as a listener? Good gab involves keeping zee lips zipped on occasion. If you master the art of listening, buds will come to you with all their dish. Just follow a few simple rules....

BE MISS INFORMED

When a friend is spilling her sauce, ask questions--not to be nosy, but to show you're interested. If she tells you she's getting a killer new 'do, don't just brush it off as mindless convo. Find out which salon she's going to. Is she changing her color? How short is she going?

When your friend is serving up her answers, wait a beat before chiming in. A short pause allows your pal to add to or finish what she has to tell you. Just be careful not to be too inquisitive. "Otherwise, it's like you're interrogating her," says Allegra, 12. Like, asking her how much money she's blowing for the cut could be crossing a line. If she wants to share information that might be personal, she'll do it without being asked.

TELL-ALL BODY LANGUAGE

Sometimes, a BFF's facial expressions or mannerisms speak louder than words. For example, if your friend is telling you she's OK about flunking her history exam but is wringing her hands, it's a sign that she really might be bugged. That's your cue to offer up a little support by maybe offering to study with her before the next big test.

Your own gestures are important, too. Is your head tilted toward her to show you're receptive of her message? Body-watcher Erin, 14, says, "If I nod my head when my BFF is talking about something that's bothering her, it helps her to get it all out because she knows I am really hearing her."

REPEAT AND RETURN

To be sure you understand where your friend is coming from, repeat--in your own words--what she just told you. If you've misinterpreted, this is her opportunity to correct you. And if you're spot-on, she knows you've heard what she said.

When a friend feels you're focused on her side of the conversation and not just waiting for your turn to talk, it makes the friendship bond that much tighter. Says Erin, "The best part about listening to my friend is knowing she listens to me, too." We hear ya loud and clear.

COPYRIGHT 2006 Girls Life Acquisition Corp.
COPYRIGHT 2008 Gale, Cengage Learning