Holy Cow! Stupefying Stunts to Motivate Students

School Administrator, Sept, 1998

Principal Pranks I

Kathryn Lofquist, principal of Lindley Elementary School in Greensboro, N.C., figured why pass up a good-natured opportunity to show up the superintendent?

So she challenged Guilford County Superintendent Jerry Weast to a cowmilking contest after students at her school surpassed a book reading goal in the Accelerated Reader program. But Weast turned out to be a ringer--after all, he grew up on a Kansas dairy farm. So Lofquist lost and had to accept her prize, a kiss from the cow.

However that fate was rather tame compared to the loony stunt agreed to by Linda York, another Greensboro principal. She allowed her school's top 74 readers to apply the condiments after she climbed into a foam-rubber hot dog bun.

"I didn't realize that mustard would burn so much," she told the Associated Press.

Principal Pranks II

School administrators sometimes have to eat their words, but those assigned to Newport Elementary School in Newport, N.C., also had to eat their worms.

The school's principal and assistant principal agreed to down two dozen of the earthy creatures--boiled, fried, baked and smothered in spaghetti sauce--after their students met a schoolwide reading challenge.

Said Principal Rob Elkins of the experience: "Most of the worms tasted like fried clam strips. You almost forgot what you were eating."

The Singing Supe

Chances are Dennis Wright may be the only guitar-playing superintendent who has recorded original works for professional development purposes.

Wright, superintendent of the tiny central New York school district of DeRuyter, has recorded a dozen songs--all of them related to education--on a compact disc and cassette tape titled "I Chose to Teach."

With song titles such as "They Helped You Learn," "The Retirement Polka," "The Renewal Song" and "Tell Me Why You're Leaving," Wright's repertoire has captured quite a following on the event circuit among teacher associations, PTAs and school boards. The refrain on one especially catchy Wright number goes "What could possibly be better than teaching in the public schools?"

Since moving up from the principalship in May, Wright says he has less time to perform at educational events, but he may offer a number or two to wrap up the next in-service day in his district.

Her First Day of School

Arlene Ackerman says she has felt enormous backing in her first months as superintendent in the District of Columbia. And that support begins at home.

The weekend before she started her job, Ackerman's husband David, at the time a principal in Seattle, paid her a surprise visit. "He made a lunch for me and at the door he said, 'Now go out there and be a good superintendent."'

No Late Meetings

Superintendents may want to advise their board members they intend to take an early leave for home, Sept. 28 to Oct. 2. That week has officially been dubbed "Eat Dinner Together Week" by the Pork Producers Council.

Short humorous anecdotes, quips, quotations and malapropisms for this column relating to school district administration and school hoard governance should be addressed to: Editor, The School Administrator, 1801 N. Moore St., Arlington, Va. 22209. Fax: 703-528-2146.

BOARD WATCH

(An occasional collection of unintentionally amusing and offbeat actions of state and local school boards and their members.)

Keep the Scalpel From Her

A member of the Miami-Dade School Board who recently received an honorary doctoral degree in May from Florida Memorial College, a tiny Baptist school that confers only bachelor's degrees, insists that she be addressed henceforth as a doctor.

So Frederica Wilson is now "Dr. Wilson" around school board headquarters. The district's deputy superintendent issued a systemwide alert, ordering all staff to take note of the change. The district also had to revise the name plaque on the board dais, according to the Miami Herald.

Says Wilson of her doctorate: "Nobody else I know has one."

Hiring Their Own Kind

Board of education members of the Grant Joint Union High School District in Sacramento, Calif., recently granted themselves permission to apply for jobs in the school district.

In overriding a standing policy, the trustees ignored the objections of a former board member who had helped create the restrictions. Merrie O'Brien said it would be too uncomfortable for district employees to evaluate the fitness of board members for a job vacancy.

"The wrath of a board member can be a pretty furious thing," she told The Sacramento Bee.