Existential theory: helping school counselors attend to youth at risk for violence

Professional School Counseling, June, 2003 by Laurie A. Carlson

THE CASE OF JAY

Jay is a 15-year-old student in a suburban high school of approximately 900 students. A counseling session with Jay revealed that he is angry and frustrated with school. His mother spends much of her time in work-related activities, and his father is a "closet alcoholic." Jay says that he feels very much like the "man of the house."

Jay feels that none of the adults in school understand his inability to complete academic work and that they just "push his buttons." He asserts that all the teachers expect students to fit into their "ideal little box" and are totally "out of touch" with who he is. In addition, Jay sees most of his peers as "over-privileged geeks" who do not understand what life is really about. In essence, Jay has come to believe that life is about fighting to get ahead, and he is unconvinced that his peers can understand his day-to-day struggles in light of what he believes their day-today lives are like. As a result of strained relations with the teachers and students in his predominantly white, middle-class high school, Jay has begun to take the city transit to a nearby urban neighborhood where he has made some relatively strong connections with some of the local adolescents. These new friendships appear to be characteristic of gang relationships and have provided Jay with the opportunity to prove his "coolness" through various petty crimes.

Jay has come to see his school counselor because of a recent increase in the harassment and taunting by his peers. Jay states that he feels more accepted by his urban peer group, but there is still a part of him that wishes he could fit in at his current high school. Recently, he has felt "on the edge" and is afraid that he is "going to blow." Jay assures his counselor that at this time he has no plans or means to harm himself or others but is afraid that if this goes on much longer, things may get "ugly." The remaining sections outline the central existential concepts relevant to Jay's case and introduce approaches that can be used by school counselors in working with students like Jay.

BEING AND MEANING

Victor Frankl and R.D. Laing asserted that connecting with one's true self leads to a fuller and more meaningful existence (Bankart, 1997). According to Frankl (1984), the only way to stay alive and rise above circumstances and fate is to find meaning in one's own existence. Jay is essentially searching for who he really is and how he fits into the world. This struggle likely has its foundation in Jay's family structure, where there seems to be little clarity of roles that separate adults from children. Existentialism proposes that certain qualities of existence influence how a person functions and lives. The first two basic qualities, being in the world and being in the world with others, provide the foundation for existential thought (Cooper, 1990). Existentialism addresses the environmental, intrapsychic, and interpersonal aspects that impact human experience (Bauman & Waldo, 1998; Boelen, 1968). To truly understand Jay's suffering, his school counselor must understand the environment defined by daily life with his family, the interpersonal pressures he feels as a result of interactions with both peer groups, and the intrapsychic struggles that Jay experiences as he tries to make sense of his life.