The dark side of success - Ask the experts: answers to your questions from the leaders in natural medicine - psychological aspects of job promotions

Natural Health, July, 2003

I just got the promotion I've sought for years, but now I feel depressed. How can I feel good about my success?

JAMES GORDON, M.D., REPLIES: Believe it or not, many people feel disappointed when they reach a long-term goal. You could be having second thoughts about your new position or feeling unqualified for the added responsibility.

The first step to a better outlook is to figure out why you're feeling low. To help tease out the reason, write down your thoughts about the promotion and what it means to you. Or try talking about it with a friend who can ask you searching questions.

Another helpful technique involves sketching a series of pictures. First, draw a picture of yourself as you are now. Your drawing doesn't have to be realistic. For example, you could sketch yourself as a stick figure or an animal. Then draw a picture of yourself reacting to your biggest problem (in this case, it probably has to do with your promotion). Finally, draw a picture of yourself as you would be without the problem. Expressing your feelings through drawings can prevent you from editing your thoughts and allow you to access your own problem-solving wisdom. These pictures may reveal how you can come out of the depression.

Once you determine what's causing your blues, you can go ahead and address those causes. For example, if you discover that you really don't want the promotion after all, talk to your supervisor about changing your responsibilities. If you feel unworthy of the new position, a pep talk from a friend may help you recognize that you deserve your success.

Or perhaps you think attaining this goal leaves you nothing to look forward to. If so, meditation can help you appreciate the present. Begin with 10 minutes every day. Sit quietly with your eyes closed and breathe deeply in through your nose and out through your mouth. Pay attention to your breath. If your thoughts distract you, acknowledge them and return your focus to your breath. The more you appreciate the moment, the more you'll enjoy your new position and the less you'll worry about not having a goal to strive for.

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