You can't eat love: constructing provider role expectations for low-income and working-class fathers

Fathering, Fall, 2004 by Kevin M. Roy

LIMITS OF SUCCESSFUL PROVIDING IN WORKING CLASS FAMILIES

Plentiful jobs and high commitments. Men in Indiana resided in a region that was hit hard by economic recessions in the early 1980s and early 1990s. However, the region recovered, and, although many jobs were lost, manufacturing industries remained in the area. As one father asserted, "This is a good place to work. I was told that there's lots of money to be made here." Even incarcerated fathers in Indiana had multiple job options in manufacturing and construction. Chicago fathers, in contrast, were employed in service jobs (shipping, food services, and janitorial positions). Success depended on their abilities to weave together two or more jobs at the same time.

Being a successful provider demanded stable work engagements over many years. Many older fathers in Indiana had long-term work engagements (20 years as an auto tech; 24 years in cryogenic metal casting; 23 years doing drywall work), whereas younger men in Indiana had opportunities to enter job training in the trades and union apprenticeships. The widespread availability of jobs led Lionel, an African American father of three sons, to reflect that, "I go anywhere, anytime, any state, town, any place there's a building going up, and I can get a job." Employers in the region seemed to "always be there to catch you," and they did not ask questions about lifestyle that might have been problematic. Jimmy, a long-term alcoholic and 45-year-old father of three teenagers, was laid off 25 times in 17 years of work. He proudly stated, "I'm always hired back somewhere. They'd call me back on Monday, and my wife would say, 'Well, he's at work.' My boss would say, 'No, we laid him off.' She'd insist, 'No, Jimmy's at [another job].'"

Stress in working class families. Successful providers in Chicago took advantage of the boom of service jobs. Although not "good careers," minimal commitments to part-time, low-wage jobs could allow fathers to spend time with their children and partners. Most of the jobs in Indiana demanded higher commitments of 50 to 70 hours each week, which left fathers little if any time at home with children and partners. Roland, a 40-year-old African American father of three children, had earned his shot at provider status, like his father before him, with a job in a steel factory. The demands of the job, however, led to the dissolution of his family.

   When I took my job and went to orientation, they tell you that
   you're going to get a divorce.... And when my wife called to see
   where I was, the manager couldn't pick up the phone. She got
   bored and found someone else. I lost something very special to me
   as far as being a father, bringing home the paycheck every
   Thursday, taking care of my kids. I used to come home, and they'd
   jump to the door for me. I used to love that--it was my life.

Similarly, Joe, a 41-year-old father of four children, sacrificed for minimum wage as a young worker and "started out in a hole that put extra pressure on me to be gone all the time. We weren't financially secure, and my wife wanted me home all the time." Joe turned his investment into a 20-year career as a union journeyman, although he lost his first marriage in the process.