No more drama! Make 2004 your year!

Ebony, Jan, 2004 by Nikitta A. Foston

He said he wouldn't leave you, but he did. You were promised a raise, but it never came. With your will diminished and your wallet empty, you put off plans to go back to school, to start your own business, or to write your first book, for yet--another year. You convinced yourself you were out of time, out of talent, or simply out of luck.

But this year, the drama ends--and the new you begins. From finance to romance and everything in between, with the courage to dream and the passion to achieve, 2004 can be your year of victory, prosperity and unlimited growth. Look beyond your circumstance to the opportunity that lies ahead, the power that lies within and the success that is just around the corner. By following these steps to happiness, wholeness and wealth, you can make 2004 the best year yet!

Learn From The Past, Don't Live There. Although it's important to acknowledge your mistakes, you cannot be a slave to them. Maturity and growth come from learning the lesson from each decision and applying that information to make better decisions in the future. "It is important to re-evaluate what you want, what you need and what you need to do differently the next time"' says Dr. Kimberly Meyer, a Chicago-based adult psychiatrist. "The choices that you make determine the quality of your life. The better your choices are, the less drama you'll have. From your health to romance, family and career, evaluate your decisions, the lessons from each, and make choices that are in alignment with your long-term goals."

Say "No." Despite the demands of our daily schedules, we cannot be all things to all people. We must learn to accept our limitations and listen to our bodies when they are telling us that we need to take a break. "If you don't fill your own reservoir, you're not going to have anything left to give anyone else," says Carol Kauffman, a Harvard psychologist and life coach. "Saying no is not about rejecting the other person." It's a conscious decision to say yes to your interests, your desires and your needs--first. Only when you've taken care of you will you have the capacity to undertake the needs of others. Make yourself a priority and treat yourself accordingly.

Know What Love Is And Isn't. Debrena Jackson Gandy, author of Sacred Pampering Principles, says, "We are so hungry for love that we confuse it with so many other things--lust, dependent, infatuation and familiarity." But when you have real love, when you have undeniable love, you'll know it. Love fulfills the soul, covers the heart and empowers you with freedom and energy. "If there is hurt and pain in your relationship, there probably isn't love, Love never leaves a footprint of pain," she says. Protect, our heart and your mind and cherish your body as the temple that it is. "We have to realize that we cannot invite just anybody into our temple. Because when someone has been in our temple, if they have dirt on their shoes, they leave footprints behind. And that residue remains long after they're gone."

Don't Let Stress Get The Best Of You. The consequences of stress, when left unchecked or mismanaged, are often more damaging than the stress itself. Heart attack, stroke, panic attacks, anxiety attacks, lost work days and productivity are just a few of the signs warning us, if not begging us, to "slow down." Reduce the stress in your life by preparing for the smaller things: Prepare for your day the night before. Start early so that you don't have to rush. Pace yourself in your career and relationships, and set realistic personal and professional expectations. Add breakfast to your daily routine, maintain a consistent sleeping pattern, and don't ask your body to do more than it's capable of doing. Learn to manage your daily priorities so that they do not become emergencies.

Get Your Body In Motion. Most people are at war with their bodies, says Debrena Jackson Gandy. "We're taxing our bodies---not exercising, not eating right and not allowing our divine machines to regenerate as they were designed to do. That's abuse and that's war."

Dr. Willarda Edwards, national health director for the NAACP and internal medicine specialist, agrees, citing the lack of proper diet and exercise among Blacks. "In the African-American community, obesity is a major factor and there are so many serious consequences as a result, including, diabetes, arthritis and stroke," she says. "Today, most people have very busy schedules, so we have to think about creating a new, more exercise-inclusive lifestyle." Taking the stairs instead of the elevator, a few leg lifts at your desk and a few extra trips to the copier machine while increasing your water intake will produce a better body and better health.

Commit To Your Passion, Not A Job. Whether you have dreamed of becoming an artist, a singer, the head of a company or the CEO of your own business, staying focused on your goal is half the battle of getting there. Think beyond the confines of a job and consider your interests, your passions and what you'd love to do for the rest of your life. "Educate yourself on what you would like to pursue," says Dr. Meyer. "Then find out who the leading minds are in the field and see if you can find a mentor. Place that experience on your resume" and gradually immerse yourself in the knowledge of where you are and where you're going." Seek additional avenues of opportunity through workshops, conferences, seminars and professional organizations to gain resources and access. "We get attached to titles such as doctor, lawyer, teacher or writer, but it's all about your ministry that is tied to your purpose," Gandy Jackson adds. "Your ministry may shift in terms of one job or another, but your calling remains the same."