What one good woman can do - For Brothers Only - love

Ebony, Feb, 2004 by Walter Leavy

IT has long been said that there is nothing better than true love, and those who have been fortunate enough to experience it will readily agree. It will inspire you; it will strengthen you; it will sustain you; it will engulf you. And it will make you time you you never thought you could be.

I'm not talking about that fly-by-night kind of love, the you-to-day-somebody-else-tomorrow kind of love. I'm talking about the you-and-me-against-the-world kind of love, the kind of love that creates the lasting beauty of a memory that stays with you for a lifetime.

So during this time when we celebrate Valentine's Day, wrap yourself around everything you know to be real and take comfort in the thought of what one good woman can do. She can make you feel what you thought you never could, do what you thought you never would. She can be your eyes when you can't see, your voice when you can't speak. She can be the wind beneath your wings, believing in you when no one else will and refusing to turn her back on you when your mountaintops turn into your valleys.

It doesn't stop there. A good woman knows how to embrace the power of conviction, commitment and perseverance to succeed against the odds. She is a woman like Thelma Audley, a gentle but strong woman who just celebrated her 60th wedding anniversary with her husband Claude.

While navigating the day-to-day of a marriage for six decades, Audley and her husband--side by side and utilizing effective activism--have become fixtures in their Wheaton, Ill., community (near Chicago), for years helping to shape and reshape the lives of residents who have benefited from their undying commitment to equality and human dignity.

There are many other Thelma Audleys out there, Black women of all ages who are dependable, determined and dedicated, and who prove day in and day out what one good woman can do.

Some of these same women are looking for, wishing for and hoping for a good man who they can share their lives with--to possibly establish the kind of long-lasting relationship that the Audleys enjoy. But these women are knowledgable enough to realize that their being is not solely defined by their association with a man. So, even if there's no romance, they continue to make valuable contributions and to make their voices heard in a variety of areas. They teach our children, operate businesses, help the homeless and make a difference at the highest-levels in--for instance--the medical, educational, political, scientific and financial worlds.

Still, we continue to hear Sisters talk about the frustrating consequences of the "Black male shortage." On the other hand, though, some Brothers, many who are considered to be "good catches," are puzzled because they are looking for love too, oftentimes, they say, with no luck.

Something is wrong when Black men and Black women can't make a love connection. Perhaps this month, when the focus is on love, fate will play a part and put some of these Brothers and Sisters on the same path.

But, Brothers, if you are fortunate enough to find that one good woman--one who cherishes you, inspires you, is faithful to you--then it's incumbent upon you to turn the tables and show her what one good man can do.