How he proposed: celebrity couples recall the day they agreed to wed

Ebony, Feb, 1990 by Renee D. Turner

HOW HE PROPOSED

WHEN romance blossoms into a desire for lifelong commitment, the wedding proposal becomes a delicate affair. Even now, there are husbands-to-be who assume the classic posture and kneel on one knee to ask for their loved one's hand in marriage. The more popular approach, though, is to pose the crucial question with much less formality and a little more imagination. At least that's true for many celebrities. And despite the sexual revolution and the women's movement, it is still true that in almost all cases the man--rather than the woman--asks the big question.

Few proposals rival the touching, nationally televised display of sportscaster Ahmad Rashad. Before millions of viewers, and while delivering half-time commentary during a 1985 Thanksgiving Day football game, he asked The Cosby Show's Phylicia Ayers Allen to marry him. The more typical backdrop, however, is a private, intimate setting. His wife unknowingly created her own, says U.S. Rep. George Crockett Jr., D-Mich. He merely seized the moment and proposed when Dr. Harriette Clark Crockett surprised him in 1979 with a picnic lunch after picking him up from the airport in Washington.

Despite the seriousness of the request, some husbands-to-be take a humorous approach. Tennis star Zina Garrison says at first she thought Houston businessman Willard Jackson was kidding when he asked her to marry him. He'd given her a "sob story" about wanting to marry her, but not being able to get her an engagement ring. He was joking about the ring but not about his intentions. The two were married in October.

Whether laced with humor or cloaked in serious discussion about children or the state of the world, the wedding proposal has been the memorable start of many successful marriages. Here are the romantic recollections of some famous couples.

NATALIE COLE AND ANDRE FISCHER

It was 3 o'clock in the morning and singer Natalie Cole and record producer Andre Fischer were simply talking when Fischer got down on his knees and said, "I would consider it an honor if you would marry me." She said she would have to consult with her son, Robert, 11, before responding. Later that same morning, Robert gave his blessings to Cole, who is enjoying renewed popularity with her latest album, Good To Be Back. She then told Fischer, whom she had known for years and dated since last January, that she would marry him. The couple were wed in September.

ZINA GARRISON AND

WILLARD JACKSON

WILLARD Jackson, a partner in an environmental management firm, had been dating tennis ace Zina Garrison for about 9 months when they were casually talking at her home in Houston and the issue of marriage surfaced. But he upset her with a "sob story" about not being able to get her an engagement ring. Since Jackson is such a practical joker, Garrison says, she simply didn't take his offer or the story seriously. But Jackson finally surprised Garrison and pulled out an engagement ring. She playfully punched him and, after a good laugh, she agreed to marry Jackson. They were wed last October.

DEBBIE ALLEN AND NORM NIXON

NORM Nixon, the former NBA standout turned entertainment manager, says he and dancer-producer-director Debbie Allen had dated for nearly two years and had been friends even longer when he popped the big question. Six years ago, just after his trade to the L.A. Clippers, the couple were discussing the possibility of living together. "We were both pretty old-fashioned about that [living together]," Nixon says. "So I said, "Why don't we get married?"' Nixon says Allen, who directs the sitcom Different World and whose latest project was the TV movie Polly, just looked at him and smiled. "Then I got down on my knees and asked," he recalls. "She finally said, 'Yes,' but the woman brought me to my knees first."

VONETTA McGEE AND

CARL LUMBLY

One day in 1985, while actors Vonetta McGee and Carl Lumbly (left) were exercising--she on a stationary bicycle and he on the floor doing stomach "crunches"--they began discussing their mutual desire to have children. Lumbly commented that neither could accomplish that goal very easily without getting married. "I asked him if he was proposing," McGee recalls. "He said, 'Yes.' So I said, 'I accept.' I knew when I met him that I could marry him. He was a solid, whole Black man. We had dated a year. And I just knew I could spend the rest of my life with him."

BARENESE AND JONATHAN BUTLER

WHILE asking for parental permission to date Barenese, his sweetheart, South African entertainer Jonathan Butler decided to get all his requests out of the way. Barenese waited in the kitchen of her Athlone, S.A., home while Butler was being interviewed for three hours by her mother. The popular performer was so nervous that he balled his new baseball cap into a knot. Nevertheless, he also decided to seek permission to marry Barenese, who was elated to overhear her mother give Butler her blessings. They were married five years ago.

HARRIETTE CLARK CROCKETT AND