To spank or not to spank?

Ebony, April, 1994 by Karima A. Haynes

Experts Say No--Some parents say Yes!

PATRICIA Edwards couldn't believe what she was hearing. A school administrator was on the telephone saying he was calling to follow up on a report of suspected child abuse involving her 10-year-old son, Jason.

Apparently, a teacher overheard Jason telling a classmate that his mother had given him a "whupping" the night before. Alarmed, the teacher reported what she heard to school officials who in turn informed state child welfare authorities. The school official on the telephone was notifying Edwards of a meeting at the school regarding the alleged abuse.

When Edwards arrived at her son's school the following day for the meeting, she angrily told the principal and child welfare officials. "I'm going to say this in front of my son and in front of you. I've wupped him before and I'm probably going to whup him again. So write down everything you have to now so you won't have to write it down again, and I won't have to come up to this school anymore."

Two years have passed since the incident occurred, and although Edwards recounts the tale with humor, she still remembers the initial shock and subsequent anger she felt when her mild spanking was misconstrued as child abuse. "I understand that teachers are required by law to report what may be an incidence of child abuse," says Edwards, who is Midwest regional promotions manager for Motown Records in suburban Chicago, "and I am glad that they are looking out for my child, but there is a difference between the child who gets an occasioal spanking and a child who [routinely] comes to school with bruises or broken limbs."

Edwards is just one of thousands of parents across the country who are trying to raise their children in an era when theur authority is constantly being challenged in both the court of law and the court of public opinion. And when it comes to mild spanking, in particular, parents sometimes are made to feel like criminals for giving their children what may be a well-deserved swat on the bottom. While child welfare advocates and child psychologists frown upon spanking as a form of discipline, many parents say a mild spanking is sometimes the only way to get through to their kids.

Spanking is an age-old tradition in Black America and many well-adjusted and successful African-Americans recall with pride stories of having been sent out into the yard to get a switch so their mothers, fathers, grandmothers or grandfathers could tan their hides. While the spankings were painful many Blacks say this form of tough love was necessary to make them straighten up and fly right. Many Blacks of earlier generations believe that most of the

disciplinary problems in the Black community today are the direct result of young parents who have lost touch with longstanding Black traditions and who have been confused by the teachings of Dr. Spockq and his followers.

Yvette and Venson Currington Sr. of Chicago have no qualms about putting the strap to the backside of their 7-year-old son, Venson II, when he gets out of line. They also don't hesitate to slap the wrist of their 3-year-old dauthter, Alexis, to prevent her from hurting herself. "I think it's impossible to raise a child to their teen-age years without eventually having to spank them," says Venson Sr., a 32-year-old assistant teacher at a Chicago public high school. "The earlier you do it, the less likely they'll need it later on.

"Everyday, I see high school boys who don't respect their elders," Venson continues. "One of the major problems among Black youths today is a lack of discipline. Discipline helps to mold character and a lack of self-discipline means a lack of character.

Like her husband, Yvette Curington is a Chicago schoolteacher who has seen her share of discipline problems among her seventh and eighth graders she teaches. "Most of the kids I teach are 13 and 14 years old and many of them have physical fights with their parents," says the 31-year-old mother. "Because many of the parents lack good parenting skills, they don't have control over their households or children."

Although he believes children should be spanked in moderation, Venson Sr. says it doesn't make it any easier when it comes to paddling his own children. "The first time I spanked Venson I felt a certain sadness," he confides. "No parent wants to hurt his child, but as a parent, it is something that I have to do. Unless I spank him now, he will get a spanking later -- by the guys on the corner, by the police or in jail."

While the Curingtons offer solid reasons for spanking, child development experts still reject mild spankings as an effective means of disciplining children. Although spanking may work in the short-term, they argue that it usually backfires in the long run.

Here are some of the reasons why experts say spanking doesn't work;

* Children often focus on the beating and not the reasons behind it.

* Spanking often generate feelings of revenge toward teh parent who administers the beating.