To know list: 7 stories you won't have time to read until Monday

Sporting News, The, March 22, 2004

(1) COMING SOON TO YOUR LIVING ROOM

A blitz package of sports-themed reality shows

Sports is coming to the reality TV trough comparatively late, and there's good reason for that: Sports already is the ultimate reality series, remember? The thrill of victory! The agony of defeat! The human drama of athletic competition! The unequaled bliss of collecting on a $50 bet after the Browns score late to beat the spread!

Ergo, there really is no good reason for a sports reality series. Take ESPN's Dream Job. Not only does it lack two tenets of conventional reality TV--Bristol, Conn., is not an island, and none of those SportsCenter wannabes walks around naked--the lone authentic sports figure participating is one of the judges, LaVar Arrington, NFL linebacker/noted broadcasting talent scout. Better to simply add a sports presence to an existing reality genre, i.e. My Big Fat Obnoxious Fiance starring Tony Siragusa.

Too late. Sports reality shows are here, and more are coming. After sampling the synopses of series that are in the works, I say some slight reprogramming is necessary to, you know, keep it real.

The Benefactor (ABC; debuts this summer): You've heard Mark Cuban wants to give away a million bucks to a complete stranger, but he hasn't divulged the competition format. What they ought to do is sign over the check to anyone who persuades David Stern to put the Mavericks in the Eastern Conference.

The Contender (NBC; fall/winter): Sylvester Stallone and executive producer Mark Burnett (Survivor, The Apprentice) follow aspiring boxers for 16 episodes of challenges. The champion gets a pro contract. If I'm in charge, Sly himself takes on Butterbean. If he lasts longer than Steve-O did in Jackass, Don King sets up a pay-per-view re-rematch with Apollo Creed.

Making the Cut (CBC; September): From thousands of applicants dreaming of a hockey career, six finalists will receive invitations to a Canadian NHL team's training camp. I would make prospects pass a Fear Factor litmus test--sitting in front of a TV for days watching video of Todd Bertuzzi assaulting Steve Moore, on every channel, without a barf bag, like other North Americans. Beauty, eh?

Golf's Ultimate Round (CBS; May): One team starts on the West Coast, another on the East Coast, traveling in motorhomes and playing 18 of the PGA's top holes. Winners will get spots in the Pebble Beach Pro-Am. You know how I'd spice thing up? By having the losers play Bushwood CC, against Happy Gilmore and his Sherwood driver.

George's Gym (unaffiliated; debut unknown): Jim Lampley's production company is pitching a group of heavyweights living and training together under the auspices of George Foreman. How 'bout you tell campers there's an outbreak of mad cow disease, then see which "tribe" votes to grill Gilbert Brown?

The Tour (unaffiliated; debut unknown): The producer of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy wants to chronicle Andy Roddick's movements on the tennis circuit with gal pal Mandy Moore, though Roddick has pulled out of the project twice and could be replaced by James Blake. If Roddick says yes, maybe we'll learn once and for all if his 140 mph serve is inspired by Mandy's hit "Candy" or by BALCO.--Fritz Quindt

(2) A FAMILIAR RING

We're taking Duke in the women's tourney, too

There's more genuine parity than the game is accustomed to. There might be eight or more teams with the capability to run the table.

Connecticut, a No. 2 seed and the two-time reigning NCAA women's champion, has a huge home-court advantage, with the chance to play the first four rounds in-state. Tennessee, which owns six national titles, was seeded No. 1 overall by the selection committee. Texas, also a No. 1 but coming off a loss in the Big 12 Tournament final, might surge from that wakeup call.

Fifth-seeded Louisiana Tech is on a 19-game winning streak. The Big Ten's tourney champ, No. 2 seed Purdue, and its regular-season champ, No. 1 seed Penn State, have a shot. So does Stanford, only a No. 6 but the best team on the West Coast.

So which team will cut down the nets April 6 at New Orleans Arena? Top-seeded Duke--top-ranked in the final regular-season polls.

The Blue Devils are healthy and highly motivated to make a third straight Final Four trip and find the success they crave. Gall Goestenkors says this is the best team she has coached in her 12 seasons at Duke, and she's right.

Alana Beard, a 5-11 lefthander, is the most versatile player in the country and the best perimeter player in the ACC since Dawn Staley. Duke also has 6-5 Iciss Tillis, a two-time MVP of the ACC tourney, and a 3-point sharpshooter off the bench in Vicki Krapohl. The Blue Devils, who lead the nation in scoring margin, have the best nine-player rotation in the country--and the best chance to win it all.--Jim Furlong

(3) SPRING FOOTBALL

Five QB competitions that will shape the '04 season

Miami (Fla.) -- Brock Berlin or Kyle Wright? Berlin, the incumbent starter, is blessed with great physical tools, but you wouldn't know it from watching last year's game films. Fair or not, Canes fans have anointed top recruit Wright the savior.