`Hey, didn't you used to be the Heat-Knicks rivalry?'

Sporting News, The, Jan 13, 2003

* Fly's opening act at the Improv: Did you hear that the SPORTING NEWS is looking to hire a copy editor? It's believed that Nick Saban and Bob Stoops are candidates for the job.... Why did Cincinnati officials pick a Sunday to make Riverfront implode and go up in smoke? Because those kinds of things always happened on Sundays at Riverfront.

* Word outta N'Awlins is the cleanup at the (S)Aints' house this offseason will rival the one on Bourbon Street every Ash Wednesday. There will be so much dust from the defensive side (holdovers are Charles Grant and Darren Howard, then who knows?), that one could, well, choke. But that doesn't mean that high-powered offense won't get tidied up a bit, and talent won't be the only factor, as a serious attitude check is in order. At the top of the 'tude-do list: Kyle Turley, whose name rhymes with surly.

* After home losses to San Diego, Northern Arizona and, ugh!, Michigan, Steve Lavin officially has changed the way Westwood hoops home should he spelled. It's now Pall-ey Pavilion. (Hey, Dan Guerrero, got that short list updated?).

* The victory column isn't the only place where the Mavs' numbers are rising, as the minutes of Dirk Nowitzki, Steve Nash and Michael Finley keep going up, up, up. Sure, injuries partly are to blame, but Nellie isn't reserving judgment when he talks about how his bench has come up short in giving The Big Three a break. Oh yeah, and what was that excuse Fly kept hearing for that second-round flameout last playoffs? Fatigue, anyone?

* Bob Knight has been doing some postgame substitutions, sending son Pat Knight to the news conference instead of going himself. The General explanation is that young Knight needs some hands-on experience in dealing with the media. Because when it comes to being mean, condescending and judgmental, you can only learn so much from watching your dad on TV.

* Finally, some shaky play-calling in the Outback Bowl turned up the Florida heat on Ron Zook (again). After hearing that the folks at FireRonZook.com were selling T-shirts with "Outback: It's Australian for Fire Ron Zook", Fly tried getting to the site to check out the shirt but kept getting blocked--because the requested page was experiencing an extremely high volume of traffic.

Fly's the very model of a modern major online column. He's full of information accessible at www.sportingnews.com

CAUGHT ON THE FLY

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