Come into my office

Sporting News, The, July 29, 2002 by Todd Jones

As someone who has spent time in bullpens in both leagues, I can tell you that bullpens can be very different. The only common thread is that the distance from the rubber to the plate is 60 feet, 6 inches.

What makes a comfortable pen? Well, the first thing is the ability to follow the game. Can you see the game, or do you feel like you need a ticket? How about a bathroom? All bullpens have them, but some make gas station bathrooms look like the Four Seasons.

Then there is the pen's location. A good pen is accessible to the clubhouse during the inning. Some--such as those in St. Louis, San Diego, Colorado, Detroit and Baltimore--have back passages under the stands to get to the clubhouse.

At others--Yankee Stadium, Seattle, Texas and Kansas City, for example--you have to wait till the inning is over. The most accessible pens are located down the sides in foul territory--like at San Francisco, Wrigley Field, Montreal and Minnesota. If you need something, you can just go get it and you don't disrupt the game. Until, of course, you start warming up, a ball gets loose, the umps have to get a batboy to retrieve it and you feel like an idiot.

Philly is bad because the mounds are partially dismantled and wheeled in and out during football season. There's a lot of concrete out there and it's real slippery, which means we with spikes on can break our necks.

Boston is tough because the bullpens are so narrow. It feels like you're going to slide your hands through a fan's nachos, which I admit might not be a bad thing, but if you're trying to warm up, it can be a problem.

The White Sox's bullpen is tough because it's next to a bar. Hey, here's an idea: Let's put the opposing team's bullpen next to a bar so drunks can tell the players why they are overpaid babies. I must say, the fans at Comiskey are pretty creative, but if you're trying to get ready, you don't need to see the fattest guy in the ballpark's belly when he decides to distract you.

The Yankees and Mets have the best security, for obvious reasons. They don't put up with much from the fans. The security guys don't ask questions. They just throw you out.

One thing that amazes me about the new stadiums is the way the bullpens seem to be afterthoughts. At Pac Bell, it's like the camera wells were cut in half and turned into bullpens. It's horrible. I had a great view of Reggie Sanders, the right fielder, but I couldn't see home plate. It's somewhat similar in Detroit, where it seems like they cut out some bleachers in right field and stuck both pens there.

The best bullpen is in Toronto. There is back access to the clubhouse. There is cushion seating. Your seats are on top of the fence, so you have a great view of the game. Because of the way the roof opens at Skydome, we're always in the shade.

Honorable mention goes to the bullpen at Coors Field. It's a good pen, but it also is so beautiful to look at with waterfalls, rocks and Christmas trees. It feels like you're at a picnic. It almost makes you forget you have to pitch at Coors if you're a visitor. Then Larry Walker and Todd Helton soon bring you back to reality.

E-mail Todd Jones, a reliever for the Rockies, at tjones@sportingnews.com.