Newman barely talks—and still says too much

Ryan Newman makes no sense at all. He has an engineering degree, so you would expect him to race conservatively ... you know, because his education taught him that playing the percentages yields the best possibility of success. But he's one of the biggest risk takers in the sport, gambling often on fuel, race strategy and aggressive setups. For a guy who has no neck, he sure sticks it out a lot.

Newman makes Matt Kenseth seem like Terrell Owens. Newman is a nearly impenetrable one-on-one interview, with every answer either a cliche or the shortest sentence possible. It must drive him nuts when he lengthens his quotes to include sponsor references.

And Newman apparently is not content to make just his own stories boring. After the second Richmond race--the cutoff before the Chase for the NASCAR Nextel Cup, the most important race of the season to date--Newman kept telling Carl Edwards to keep his answers short, which was like asking the pope not to wear a funny hat.

Yet despite saying as little as possible, Newman somehow keeps getting himself in trouble with his mouth. His teammate Rusty Wallace and NASCAR head the list of those wishing Newman would keep his opinions to himself.

I won't dissect his feud with Wallace except to say I think it's great and I wish Wallace weren't retiring just so those two could keep jabbing each other. If there weren't rules against it, I'd make up quotes from one or both just to keep it going.

Newman's beefs with NASCAR are just as interesting. Not to be overly dramatic, but I get the feeling NASCAR officials want Newman to win a championship as much as they want an investigation into their claim they have 75 million fans. NASCAR wants its champions to be smiling, pretty-girl-kissing acolytes of all that makes the sport wonderful. Newman does smile. And his wife is pretty. As for the rest ...

Newman first started beating on NASCAR over the Lucky Dog rule, which states that when a caution flag flies, the first driver who is a lap down gets his lap back. Newman essentially says this rule is stupid and unfair and that if a driver goes a lap down he should earn it back by racing. He's right, but the rule is in place for safety reasons. Of course, the first driver to win after benefiting from the Lucky Dog rule was none other than Newman.

Newman has been one of the most outspoken critics of the Chase. Now, he stands a good chance to win his first title. Under the old system, he would be out of it.

I told you Newman made no sense, didn't I? He's a contradiction wrapped in a firesuit.

speed reads

For the second time this year, Richard Childress is upset with NASCAR because it punished his cheating crew chief. Childress shouldn't get mad; he should do what Rick Hendrick does: Hire guys who don't get caught.

Here's a prediction: Jamie HcHurray will finish in 11th place and pick up the $1 million that goes with it. And only the people who get part of that bonus will notice.

INSIDE DISH

by Lee Spencer

NASCAR last week unveiled plans for incorporating the car of tomorrow into current racing fleets and for setting a cap on the number of teams--early indications are that it would be three--that one owner can operate in a series. Jeff Gordon, who is listed as the owner of the No. 48 Hendrick Motorsports Nextel Cup Chevrolet, says that if NASCAR's plan is to limit the number of teams for one owner, franchising should be considered. "There is a big investment that goes into it," Gordon says. "It would be nice to know there is value in that team beyond the ability to pull sponsorship and put good racecars on the track." NASCAR investigated the possibility of franchising several years ago but determined the process would be too complicated to execute. * Carl Edwards tested the COT at Talladega last week along with Kyle Petty and NASCAR technical adviser Brett Bodine. Edwards reports that the bigger car drove more like a truck. More important, he said, the car will make racing safer. "I think it's a good step forward," Edwards says. "It might even be a little bit more exciting, and we currently have exciting races, so that's pretty wild." A second COT test is planned after the Atlanta race. * Matt Kenseth describes the "old" Lowe's Motor Speedway as a fun track with a lot of character and as a place where a driver with a fast car easily could pass the competition. But the 2003 Cup champ and winner of the 2000 Coca-Cola 600 is concerned about future racing there because the track was ground down and repaved in the past year. "It's always been one of my favorites, but it's different than it used to be," he says. "I just hope they take it and repave it and start over for next year." Kenseth complimented the paving jobs at Richmond and Homestead that almost instantly encouraged side-by-side racing. * Jack Sprague has split from Xpress Motorsports and no longer will drive the No. 16 Chevrolet truck. The former Craftsman Truck champ is replacing Chad Chaffin in the No. 60 Toyota Tundra. Bobby Laborite will drive the No. 16 at Martinsville. A permanent replacement hasn't been named. * A.J. Foyt IV is moving from open-wheel to stock cars, taking over for Kasey Kahne in the No. 38 Akins Motorsports Dodge in the Busch Series. Foyt, 21, will race the final four events of the Busch schedule and compete for Rookie of the Year in 2006. Evernham Motorsports will provide the engines.