Picking and choosing: staring at a smorgasbord of 28 bowl games can be daunting, so sink your teeth into these storylines and matchups first

Sporting News, The, Dec 22, 2003 by Tom Dienhart

All this means the clock operator at Aloha Stadium will have a sore index finger the next day. It also means you could have a very sore behind.

The best bowl team with ...

... 1 loss: Southern California. Those human pollsters really know their stuff.

... 2 losses: Michigan. As talented at the skill positions as the 1997 team, which shared the national title.

... 3 losses: Kansas State. Because either side of the ball can carry the Wildcats to a win.

... 4 losses: Florida. Had the most impressive three-game stretch of any team in the land, winning at LSU, at Arkansas and against Georgia.

... 5 losses: Texas Tech. Sickeningly foul on defense but so adept in the passing game it has a shot at winning no matter the opponent.

... 6 losses: California. Led by coach Jeff Tedford, a great offensive mind, and quarterback Aaron Rodgers, a future NFL first-round pick. Oh, yeah, and the Bears beat USC.

Best bet to last less than three hours Independence Bowl, Missouri vs. Arkansas

With this game, you get our time-saver guarantee. The Independence Bowl features offenses that love to push and shove their way down the field, making it a lock to end inside of 180 minutes.

Missouri's attack goes something like this: See Brad Smith get shotgun snap, see Brad take two steps back, see Brad run. It has worked well enough for Missouri to get to its first bowl since the 1998 season.

Arkansas' coaches actually require 6-5, 225-pound quarterback Matt Jones to take a snap under center and hand off, usually to 6-1, 225-pound running back Cedric Cobbs, who runs behind 6-5, 370-pound tackle Shawn Andrews.

These teams are proof that there's no use glitzing up an offense with passes when a good punch in the nose will suffice.

Best day (other than January 1) December 31.

A moment of silence as we give thanks to the football gods for this gaggle of goodies on December 31. What an intoxicating way to spend New Year's Eve, watching five--five!--bowl games.

* Music City Bowl, Auburn vs. Wisconsin. The Tigers' and Badgers' seasons were filled with depression, defeat and disappointment; they were the stuff of which country songs are written. Maybe they can inspire some young songwriter in Nashville.

* Liberty Bowl, Utah vs. Southern Mississippi. These programs don't get much attention, which gives you the chance to impress your friends and family with factoids like these: Did you know Utah's Urban Meyer is one of the hottest coaches in the nation? Dial you know NFL scouts are drooling over the potential of Southern Miss linebacker Rod Davis?

* Independence Bowl, Missouri vs. Arkansas. Missouri appears to be on the rise under third-year coach Gary Pinkel, the nation's leader in furrowed brows and squinting eyes. Arkansas appears to be on the way down with the expected flight of several underclassmen to the NFL and a rough 2004 schedule looming. Hey, at least Houston Nutt still has the coolest name in coaching.

* San Francisco Bowl, Colorado State vs. Boston College. This game features one disappointing team (Colorado State), one surprising team (Boston College) and lots of boring offense. These schools probably feel lucky just being in a bowl, even if it lacks a catchy name.