Time to break out the hair dye: one thing is for sure when it comes to this year's Super Bowl: the winner will see red

Sporting News, The, Feb 11, 2005 by Joe Buck

Well, here it is: the moment I have been waiting for my whole career. This week, something magical will happen in Jacksonville, and I know I will never be the same. I, Joseph Francis Buck, will get to play the TPC at Sawgrass. I cannot wait to stare down the island green on 17 and dunk an overpriced Titleist into the drink. That will be unforgettable.

Oh, yeah, I'm calling the Super Bowl, too. Will the game be memorable? Who knows? History says the odds are against it, but I am a dreamer, and I believe the Eagles' odds of winning are far better than Vegas says they are. The Eagles will figure out a way to score on that swarming New England defense. I mean, c'mon--it's Donovan McNabb! There is no way you can pin him down and make him that kind of an underdog.

Crazier things have happened. Did anyone think Clay Aiken, with that dopey look, had a chance to win American Idol the first time they saw him? OK, he didn't win, Ruben Studdard did, but that is not important. The important thing is we all love Clay now and cannot get enough of his music. "If I was invisible ..."? 'Fess up, Aiken, you know you have us right where you want us--eating out of the palm of your pale hand.

And what were the odds of Conan O'Brien becoming a successful talk show host and the heir to the Carson throne? Not believable if I think back to the first time I saw him after he took over at NBC for David Letterman. He was awkward and nervous and wore a pompadour. Now he is considered the hippest dude of late night, just waiting for the dancing Itos to carry Jay Leno off to TV Land.

What do Conan and Clay have in common? It's a redhead thing. These "reds" are defying odds and taking over the world one piece at a time. The earliest sign of the redhead revolution should have been obvious. It happened in 1993 when Lyle Lovett convinced (Jedi mind-tricked) Julia Roberts to marry him. Wow! That might have been the beginning of the apocalypse, and we just didn't catch it. Lovett is not of this earth, because there is no way anyone could overcome those odds. Make no mistake, there is red in that crazy, gravity-defying hair of his. Trust me, there is no other way to explain it.

I don't want to make this like The Da Vinci Code, but it is all there for us to see. The signs all point to the color red. Under the odd white wig George Washington wore? That's right, a head full of glorious red locks. Want something more current? More disturbing? Flip on your TV and wait for the next AT&T ad. What do you see? Yes, it's Scott "Carrot Top" Thompson, and he is getting paid for that! How many hit records did the Eurythmics have after Annie Lennox dyed her hair blond? What happened to Cyndi Lauper? You guessed it--she's not red anymore.

Finally, the most obvious examples of the power of red in society today, two men who personify success: Ronald McDonald (600 billion served can't be wrong) and Donald "The Chick Magnet" Trump. How many bankruptcies can one man file and still buy a golf course?

The winner of Super Bowl 39: the Eagles. Why? Andy Reid. He is the mastermind who got Philadelphia through the NFC, and he is big and red. The Eagles will overcome the odds and win. Or they will cover. Or they might lose. I am not sure. I heard Bob Kraft dyes his hair.