Out of the mouths of babes

Sporting News, The, April 10, 1995 by Steve Marantz

Pitcher Doc Medich once said of Rickey Henderson, "He's like a little kid in a train station. You turn your back on him and he's gone."

Kids, like Henderson, move quickly. Now you see them, now you don't.

Former Giants infielder Tito Fuentes once explained why pitchers should not throw at him. "I'm the father of five or six kids," Fuentes said.

It's easy to lose track of kids.

"Baseball was made for kids," Hall of Fame pitcher Bob Lemon said, "and grown-ups only screw it up."

If baseball is for kids, then strikes, NLRB complaints and injunctions are for adults. But how are those things affecting the way kids see baseball?

How badly are grown-ups screwing up baseball for kids? It's an important question - strike or no strike - because baseball needs kids. Without kids, baseball soon will be wearing dentures and a hairpiece.

To explore, I borrowed a page from hotshot political consultants who put their candidates in and out of touch with voters. I organized a focus group. The demographics of my group tend to be overlooked by the hotshots. Nine-year-old boys can't vote.

It is a brisk, windy early-spring Saturday north of Boston, before the players come in from their strike, and R.J. Gamer, Max White, Zach Freeman and my son, Alex, are in a baseball frame of mind. The big leaguers are out on strike, but Little League tryouts are this afternoon. They don't mind answering a few questions about baseball, at least for as long as the chocolate-chip cookies hold out. Max can't remember to keep dirty sneakers off new upholstery, R.J. wants to wrestle, Alex is counting Pogs, and all four are given to inexplicable fits of hilarity. Otherwise they are attentive, thoughtful and cute.

First, a warmup question: "What do you like about baseball?"

"It's fun," R.J. says

"What's fun about it?"

"Batting," R.J. says

"You get cards," Alex says. "And you can play and throw."

"It's really fun," Zach says.

"I like to bat, that's all," Max says.

Conclusion: Sorry, Ken Burns. Baseball is not a metaphor for life to 9-year-olds. It's just fun.

The boys are asked their favorite sport. Baseball gets two votes, basketball and football one each.

Zach, voting for baseball, says, "It's a lot more competitive and challenging than just dribbling past a guy and throwing the ball in the hoop. You have to hit a ball that's pretty fast and outrun it to first base. It's really fun."

Max, voting for football, says, "I like to tackle guys."

Conclusions: 1) Baseball still is the best game to play, and 2) Max gets raw steak for lunch.

They are asked their favorite players. Jeff Bagwell (a New Englander) gets three votes, Frank Thomas and Junior Griffey two apiece, Barry Bonds and Kirby Puckett a vote apiece.

"No pitchers?" I ask.

R.J.: "I can't think of any." Alex: "Randy Johnson." Zach: "Roger Clemens." Max: "Nolan Ryan."

Conclusion: Greg Maddux has three Cy Youngs, but until his picture appears on a Pog he's a cipher to 9-year-olds.

Now the serious stuff. Why, I ask, did the players strike?

R.J.: "Because they're not getting enough money and they're being selfish and it's stupid and they're stupid, too."

Alex: "They don't want to play baseball anymore. They'd rather have money than play baseball."

Zach: "You could go out and play baseball every day for nothing and that would be really fun. And now you want more money and not play? It's ridiculous."

Max: "They hate to practice."

Conclusion: Players have inflicted a deep and painful wound on children. Anger masks their disillusionment.

Do the boys have a favorite owner?

RJ: "I don't know any."

Alex: "I like the Blue Jays' owner because I went to their training camp in Florida. I don't know his name."

Zach: "I like the Astros' and Mariners' owners. I like them because of Jeff Bagwell and Ken Griffey Jr."

Max: "I don't like any owners. They're mean."

Conclusions: Owners are nameless and faceless to 9-year-olds.

Would boys want to be an owner?

R.J.: "Depends on what team."

Alex: "I wouldn't want to unless I could have a team that makes money. "

Zach: "No, I wouldn't want to because it's not really that much fun to sit around and boss people and watch them play. I'd rather just play."

Max: "No, I think it would be boring. You have to wear a suit."

Zach again: "Teams that win the championship make a lot of money."

Conclusion: Ownership is boring but tolerable if your club is profitable.

Who is greedier, owners or players?

R.J.: "Players."

Alex: "Players."

Zach: "Players."

Max: "Owners."

Conclusion: Max is a future labor lawyer.

In "The Boys of Summer," author Roger Kahn found former Brooklyn Dodgers third baseman Billy Cox, middle-aged and portly, tending bar 15 years after his last game. Kahn writes:

"What do you do now, Bill?" I said. "What is it you like to do?"

"Watch kids," he said. His eyes gazed cavernous and blank. "Watch little kids play third. They make some plays."

Cox found comfort in the innocence and promise of children. Perhaps he was suggesting a way for baseball's owners and players to get along in the future. Watch kids.

Steve Marantz is a senior writer for The Sporting News.