The Long View - Brief Article

National Review, Sept 16, 2002 by Rob Long

MEMORANDUM

to: Bill Clinton, Harry Thomason

cc: L. Moonves, M. Karmazin

from: CBS Research

re: First 12 segments focus group results -- excerpts

Dear Harry and Bill:

Please find attached the focus group findings for the first 12 segments of "Friends of Bill" for your review. As mentioned on the phone, these are just initial results. Let's talk when you've had a chance to review them.

ASI focus group conducted on 4/12/03

Participants: White Male 30's (wm30); White Female 40's (wf40); African-American Female 50's-60's (aaf5060); Tween Female (tf); Preteen Male (ptm); Asian-American Male 50's (asa50); Young White Female 20's (ywf); African-American Male 30's (aam30); and Moderator (mod).

mod: Let's talk about how he looked . . .

aaf5060: I really liked the suit. And the hat I thought was so, just so . . . can I say elegant?

tf: You liked that hat?

mod: Wait, which hat are you referring to?

aaf5060: The one at the beginning of the show. The fur one?

mod: During the dance number?

aaf5060: I didn't know he was supposed to be dancing. Was that dancing?

wf40: It wasn't dancing dancing. It was just kind of interpretive movement, I think.

wm30: When he was wandering through the streets of New York, kind of looking up at all the buildings in wonder or whatever? And sort of singing "New York, New York"?

asa50: It was more sing-talking, you know. Like Rex Harrison in "My Fair Lady."

ptm: He looked gay.

mod: Does anyone else feel that he looked gay?

ptm: Who is he, anyway? Like, a doctor or whatever?

tf: I saw him on "Entertainment Tonight."

mod: To continue, for a moment, on the appearance of the host. How did people feel about his overall "look"?

aaf5060: As I said, I think he looked elegant and regal. Especially later in the dashiki.

wm30: What the hell was that?

aaf5060: It's an African ceremonial garment.

wm30: So why was he wearing it?

aam30: He was interviewing that woman, what's her name?

wf40: Yeah, who was she?

mod: National Security Advisor Condoleezza Rice.

asa50: But she was wearing a suit.

aaf5060: It doesn't matter what she was wearing. I think he looked super in the dashiki. The yellows and the reds and the star patterns . . . he just looked like Luther Vandross. I wanted to eat him up.

ywf: I thought he looked fat.

aaf5060: Yeah, he looked fat.

wm30: Yeah, he looked fat.

wf40: I agree. Pretty fat.

aam30: Yeah, fat.

asa50: Especially around the face.

tf: Yeah, a fat face.

ptm: Why did they give a fat gay guy his own show or whatever?

mod: Moving on, how did you feel about the "Sharing and Caring" segment?

aaf5060: I thought it was very moving and very tastefully done. It showed restraint but it also showed how much the man cares.

wm30: Is that the part where he cried all over that Flight 93 widow?

mod: I believe she was the guest during that segment, yes.

wm30: Oh, man, I hated that part.

wf40: I felt uncomfortable during that part.

mod: Why did you feel that way?

wf40: Because he was like, crying. And she wasn't. It was like he felt worse about her husband's death than she did. It was weird. Plus he kept slipping his hand up her leg.

tf: Oh my God! I saw that! It was so totally gross!

wm30: Actually, that part I sort of thought was funny.

asa50: It was strange when they hugged, though . . .

tf: For, like, an hour!

mod: Why do you say it was strange?

asa50: It looked like she was comforting him, I guess.

aaf5060: He felt bad about her husband! She was making him feel better!

aam30: Yeah, but he was movin' those hands, man . . .

wm30: You gotta give him props for that, dude . . .

aam30: That's right, dawg!

wm30: You don't shoot, you don't score, am I right?

aam30: You are right!

mod: If we can just get back to the show, how did we all feel about the mystery-celebrity segment?

ptm: Was that that other fat gay guy or whatever?

mod: Rob Reiner is not gay.

ptm: What . . . ev . . . er.

tf: It was weird having two fat guys talking to each other about, like, not how fat they both are.

mod: They were discussing current legislative initiatives involving child-care issues.

tf: Yeah. I guess.

aaf5060: I was fascinated by the high level of the discourse.

wm30: I was playing Solitaire on my cell phone.

ywf: I was kind of bored, I guess. I just kept asking myself, when is Emeril going to come out and cook that special pizza they said he was?

aam30: That pizza looked good.

wm30: Yeah, I coulda used some of that pizza.

asa50: All that cheese . . . delicious.

ywf: I made it last night for my boyfriend and he loved it!

ptm: Who is that guy, anyway?

mod: Emeril Lagasse is a chef in New Orleans who --

ptm: No, I know who Emeril is. I mean the other guy.

mod: Bill Clinton?

ptm: Yeah. Who is he again?

mod: Perhaps it's time to end the session.

ptm: We get 50 bucks for this, right?