Ellen Degeneres

Interview, July, 2003 by Alanis Morissette

TOTALLY OVER THE LOOPY GIRLFRIEND SAGA, AND ABOUT TO TICKLE RIBS AGAIN WITH A BUNCH OF VARIED NEW PROJECTS, HERE THE COMEDIAN OPENS UP ABOUT THE FUNNY AND UNFUNNY STUFF--AND DECLARES WAR ON FRENCH MAINCURES.

ALANIS MORISSETTE: Hi! How are you?

ELLEN DEGENERES: I'm good. How are you?

AM: Good. You just finished touring America, and the final couple of shows were shot for a late June HBO special. How'd that special happen?

ED: I'm doing a talk show that starts airing in the fall, and I had a year to prepare. I had nothing to do, and I thought, I'll write a book. And then I thought, I can't just sit at home and write a book. I'll get rusty. I've got to talk to people, so I'll go on tour. And then I thought, If I go on tour, I might as well shoot an HBO special. It'd be good to have that come out before the talk show.

AM: So in the midst of all of this, were you able to write the book? Or did you put that on the back burner?

ED: No, I wish. But if you want to contribute, I'm taking a chapter from everyone. Are you touring right now?

AM: I'm going on tour in Europe in July, but I'm pretty much resting now and starting to write a record. I'm curious about how your talk show turns out, because I was interviewed by you for the pilot.

ED: Yeah, well, you know, there are two schools of belief: One is that interviewing people is really easy and anyone can do it, and then there's the one that not everyone can do it--you've seen how many talk shows have failed. I think it either comes naturally or it doesn't, and it's just about listening and being genuinely interested in people. A lot of comedians don't listen. It's more about them than letting the guest shine.

AM: What kind of a balance have you found? Is it 50-50--you being your charming self half the time, and the other half you being interested in them?

ED: I think it depends on the guest. If a guest is really good and giving you something, you follow that energy. I interviewed this woman, 95 years old, who's the baking champion of Minnesota, [Morissette laughs] who's 4 foot 2, and who was hysterical. I really don't want to just interview celebrities.

AM: Cool. What are you calling your show?

ED: Probably The Ellen DeGeneres Show. I'm running out of ways to say my name, so this is the last show, I think. My first show was Ellen. The second show was The Ellen Show. And now, it's The Ellen DeGeneres Show. And then I'm out, because I'm out of names.

AM: What about your middle name?

ED: I could start using my middle name, Lee, but then no one will know it's me. Maybe the next show, nobody should know it's me.

AM: But they'll find out because your charm and wit will fly out of your ass by default.

ED: You know, I'm hoping my charm and wit flies out of my ass.

AM: How's your relationship?

ED: It's going on three years now, and it's healthy and thriving and lovely. I feel like I'm in a really good place. And you?

AM: I'm in a really good place, too. I feel like there's more communication than I've ever had, which probably says a bit about where I'm at. But I'm still always terrified. Are you terrified?

ED: No, I've never been terrified. I have always jumped in and naively thought that everything was lovely. But I used to be the kind of person that, when there was any problem, I would try to run, or chase the other person away, because I didn't want to do the work.

AM: That's kind of a form of terror, though.

ED: Well, I didn't recognize it as that. And I think it's because I grew up in a house where no one fought. All of a sudden, when I was 13, my parents divorced--no one ever yelled or raised their voice in my house, so any kind of upset I viewed as imbalanced, unhealthy.

AM: What things do you do to distract yourself? The typical sort of distractions are television, cigarettes, substance abuse, chocolate, whatever. I have found that I use what is typically viewed as a relaxation thing--like taking a bath or drinking tea-- as a distraction. I was curious if you find sneaky ways to run away from everything.

ED: Well, the first thing I did this morning was feed my fish. I have this little koi pond. And when you called I was in the yard watering, which there's no need for because I have sprinklers. But there's something really calming about it.

AM: There was a period of time when you sort of "escaped" to Ojai [California] to get away from the illusory element of the industry and everything--from what I understood, anyway.

ED: It was like, What am I doing here when there are no jobs being offered anymore? And when I'm getting slammed by what felt like every magazine? I was hurt and thought, I'd rather live on a farm. So I went to Ojai. It was a really important thing to do for myself, growthwise--I think I came back with a little bit of maturity. I've worked for 20 years to get where I am. I'm a writer and a performer and I love making people laugh. This is what I'm meant to do. It's where I belong. I can't run away from it, because it's what I love doing. I accept that there are going to be people who say, "I don't like her." You have people that absolutely hate you, and then you have these fanatics who tell you you're God.