Ingratiate your way to a raise? Rather than moving on, getting on with the boss can advance your career

Kiplinger's Personal Finance Magazine, March, 1998 by Marc L. Schulhof

Harry Truman once said, "When in doubt, do what's right." Easy for him to say. He was the president. His salary was set by law. And who needs to worry about a promotion when you already have the highest job in the land?

You, on the other hand, don't have that luxury. Not that you don't need moral standards. But let's be honest. You probably do need, and deserve, more money. Your office isn't as big (nor as cornerly) as you'd like. And even in your collegial, one-for-all-and-all-for-one working environment, competition is so fierce that you stand at the water cooler with your back to the wall.

So how do you get ahead?

The experts all say that your best move is usually to move away. Bail. Go to another company, one where your talents and accomplishments will be recognized -- and rewarded.

But there's a wee problem with what the experts say: It's tough work switching jobs. Not just the resume-revising, networking and sneaking to interviews, but the psychological leap of faith it requires. What if the new job doesn't work out? What if your new boss is worse? What if you fail?

So you'll take the devil you know over the devil you don't. But you still want to get ahead and get a big, fat raise come review time.

How are you going to pull off that rather daunting feat?

Easy. You're going to kiss up.

THE DIRECT APPROACH. Granted, most career counselors don't recommend such a strategy. They don't even condone it (something about insincerity being transparent). Instead, the experts believe that communication is the workplace wonder drug, your ticket to job bliss and bigger bucks.

"Don't make all your problems with your boss into management theory," warns Tom Welch, president of Career Dimensions in Stuart, Fla. "So much just comes down to communication. It's so easy. The better you and your boss understand each other, the better job you're going to do."

That means, Welch says, knowing what your boss expects from you and keeping him or her posted on your progress. Your boss's perception of your work will improve, which can only benefit you in the long run.

After establishing your boss's expectations, says Laura Berman Fortgang, president of InterCoach Development and Training in Verona, N.J., consider turning the communication tables and telling your boss what you think.

"Help your bosses help you," Fort-gang stresses. "Say to them, `This is how you'll get the best out of me,' whether it's more time or resources you need." Just be prepared to deliver if you get what you ask for. SWEET SERVILITY. That's all swell, but let's say you can't see yourself going to work Monday morning and reengineering your relationship with your boss. Opening communication channels, setting clear expectations for your work, providing regular progress reports -- that all sounds time-consuming, if not downright unnatural. Isn't there an easier way?

Maybe there is. Maybe you really can ingratiate your way to a raise -- but not if you approach it as a novice. The key is to go beyond the tired compliments. You must transcend the mundane superlatives and recognize a simple truth: At some level, everyone, even the boss, is more concerned about himself or herself than about anyone else.

"Your boss doesn't care about you, your agenda, your career ambitions, your mortgage payment, zip," says Martin Stoller, a communications professor at Northwestern University's J.L. Kellogg Graduate School of Management. "And he shouldn't. He cares about whether you're doing your job. If you approach any interaction with spurious thoughts that he cares about you, you are going to make mistakes."

While Stoller's caricature of the boss as self-centered and uncaring may be a far cry from how things work where you work, you still need to conduct yourself as if your boss doesn't care about you. Stoller, who also teaches communication skills to bosses, says the fundamental rule is this: Work backward from the audience, not forward from the self.

"Easiest thing to say," he observes, "hardest thing to do."

How do you implement this best practice of the career-ladder set? Focus on what your boss wants. Forget, for example, that you want a raise because your kids need orthodontia. Straight teeth for your progeny is not high on your boss's list. How about the fact that you spearheaded your division's computer conversion, which will make it more profitable next quarter? Now you're getting warmer.

"Your boss is ready looking for you to accomplish things that win get his or her job done," says Welch. "Bosses want to look good for their superiors." The more you fit into that strategy, the better.

The key, of course, is to be certain your boss knows how well you're doing. (Small point here: You might have to volunteer for extra work or produce stellar results on projects you're currently completing. If you have nothing to brag about, all bets are off.) The trick is to let those jewels come out naturally, in conversation or woven into a memo, rather than in a pitifully self-congratulatory burst.

"Have some anecdotes to tell the boss when you're standing together in the cafeteria line:' advises Granville Too good, an executive career consultant with a firm by the same name in