Extreme make over: how good do you look on paper? Here's how to produce an effective resume

Black Enterprise, Sept, 2004 by Laura Egodigwe

CATHERINE MACKEL, AN INFORMATION technology expert, is employed, but her current resume hasn't landed her any interviews. "My resume isn't working well for me at all," says Mackel, 35. "[It's] posted on at least five different resume sites. Since January, I've had two calls."

Though the job market is improving, the hunt for employment is more competitive than ever. According to Jeevan DeVore, vice president of operations for CareerPerfect.com, a global resume and career services firm based in Bellingham, Washington, a resume must accomplish three tasks: "It gets you in the door, it supports you during the interview, and it supports you in your absence when an employer is making the hiring decision." Its your "personal marketing document," she elaborates.

Mackel prepared her resume on her own. She's an IT consultant with a Fairfax, Virginia. technology firm that helps the government use the Internet and other advanced technologies to improve productivity and information sharing. "As I objectively look at my current resume, I realize that my bulleted lists do not speak to the vast knowledge that I've gained in the past 12 years."

Mackel says she is ready to leave behind the "unstable" contracting business. Her work on contracts through the firm can last two to four years, but when a contract ends, the possibility of a layoff looms. She has been laid off once during her career. She is seeking greater job stability, as well as a shorter commute from her home in Silver Spring Maryland, where she lives with her husband, Craig, and their three small children. Mackel has sent out about 50 resumes via e-mail, regular mail, fax, and Internet posting and has had no requests for interviews. Hoping to create a document that speaks well of her accomplishments, Mackel agreed to let LeRachel H. Buffkins, owner of Writing for You Inc., a resume-writing business based in Laurel, Maryland, perform an extreme makeover.

MACKEL IS HAPPY WITH HER REDESIGNED RESUME

before

* Mackel's current resume runs three pages, which is long, wordy, dense with text, unfocused, and filled with jargon and acronyms.

* It fails to paint a clear picture of her goals or the industry or position she is targeting. "If an employer looks at this resume, they'll question what it is that she wants to do," says Buffkins. "It's just saying, 'These are the things I've done--fit me in where you think I can be utilized.'"

* Mackel begins her resume with highlights of her qualifications, including a mention of her "excellent interpersonal and management skills."

* After highlights, she lists her education--a B.A. in sociology and anthropology from Swarthmore College in Swarthmore, Pennsylvania, and a master's degree in health administration from Cornell University in Ithaca, New York.

* After education, Mackel features her technical certifications and training, including software such as Microsoft Office Suite 2000 and PVCS Tracker, a specialized software used to track versions of software code and development.

* Most of Mackel's experience begins with her job title, except the first listing, which begins with her status as a senior member of the technical staff.

* Mackel includes a lengthy explanation of a software system for a project on which she worked. She says she did so to help interviewers understand her past work. Because so much space is used on summing up a project, vital details of the actual work she performed became secondary.

* Bulleted points detailing the work she performed begin with the dates of employment.

* There are also a couple of typos.

[ILLUSTRATION OMITTED]

after

* Mackel's resume is slimmer, less dense with text, and therefore easier on the eye. It's one page shorter and more elegantly structured.

* A bold-faced headline touts Mackel as an "information technology expert" and highlights her combination of technical knowledge and healthcare administration experience.

* Buffkins added a bulleted section at the top of the resume listing Mackel's "core competencies." They include her certifications and training, adding focus to her resume and containing much of the formerly rampant jargon.

* In the section listing core competencies, Buffkins featured hard skills like technical writing, software development, and system testing. She eliminated soft ones like Mackel's interpersonal skills.

* Many acronyms have been deleted or contained, and much of the jargon has been tamed. Mackel's resume is easier to read.

* The first page of Mackel's two-page resume now holds two full sections of her employment history, whereas only part of one had fit before. "If employers are not impressed with the beginning, they won't continue [reading]," Buffkins notes. Now, she says, "by the time they get to [Mackel's] education, they may be totally convinced to bring her in for an interview."

* Buffkins began each separate section of Mackel's employment history with the employer rather than dates. That puts the focus where it belongs.

* Buffkins also broke out details of Mackel's skill set that previously had been grouped together, making them hard to decipher.