Net.Speak: The Internet Dictionary

Black Enterprise, July, 1996 by Merlisa Lawrence Corbett

If you're going to surf the Internet, make the most of your online correspondence by becoming proficient in Netspeak. Netspeak is the techno-babble bandied about in cyberspace. Net.Speak: the Internet Dictionary by Tom Fahey ($15 Hayden Books) offers readers a comprehensive look at Internet lingo. Here's a quick course in Netspeak and Netiquette to help take you from newbie to Net god.

Any newbie, rookie on the Internet, should avoid becoming a spewer - one who believes everything he or she types is of interest to everyone. Spewers are sometimes guilty of spamming - spraying unsolicited messages to every newsgroup or e-mail address. A newsgroup is a collection of messages about a particular subject. You can access them on the Internet or through Usenet - a system linking thousands of bulletin boards. To find these newsgroups you may want to use a gopher - a menu - based search program to help you find what you want.

Now that you know some terminology you'll want to brush up on your Netiquette - an informal set of rules on proper behavior on the Internet. If you post unsolicited advertising on a newsgroup, other users may respond by flaming you - sending a rash of angry messages. One who routinely sends out electronic insults is called flamer. Don't let flamers frighten you into becoming a lurker - one who reads messages but never posts anything. On the other hand, don't be a blatherer - someone who takes three screens to say something when three words would do.

After you've found your way around the Internet, you'll want to get a grasp on acronyms. You should know that HTML stands for hypertext markup language, and it's the most widely used coding scheme to create web pages. If someone tells you a funny joke, you should respond by typing LOL - laughing out loud. If the joke was hysterical, type ROTFL - rolling on the floor laughing.

Seek the answers to FAQs - frequently asked questions. But take care not to offend the TPTB - the powers that be. The better versed you become in Netspeak, the more your cyber pals will think you're a Net god - a long time and revered Internet user. So get with it, ASAP.