Office tics - understanding body language - includes related article on detecting deceptive motives through actions

Men's Fitness, July, 1998 by Joy Davidson

"The window of meaning is the period after you've asked the question you think someone's lying about, and before they've answered it," Millner says. "Once they've started talking, the body language doesn't count."

Of course, if you believe she's lying, you shouldn't angrily confront her with it. That can only result in accusations of paranoia. Instead, try to create an atmosphere in which she feels comfortable revealing the truth. When people lie in intimate relationships, it's often because they don't feel safe with complete self-revelation. The point of trying to read her is to help remove obstacles to open communication.

It's that broadening of communication that makes understanding body language a valuable skill in every facet of life. Knowing more about how someone feels and thinks will not only give you a business and personal advantage, but boost your confidence as well.

Seattle-based therapist Joy Davidson, PhD, answers your sex questions in our "Ask Dr. Joy" column.