Panic Caused by a Fish

Literary Review, Summer, 2004 by Leung Ping-Kwan

Panic Caused by a Fish

   "the fish, originated in china
   propagated in american lakes
   has caused panic among the residents
   the ministry of internal affairs announced
   this aggressive atrocious fish
   has to be banned from import"

   "how appalling, such aliens
   firm-jawed and sharp-teethed, big-mouthed and greedy
   look evil too
   exactly the frankenfish from the movies
   probably would gobble up everything in the american lakes
   probably would gobble up everything in america"

   "how appalling, such monsters
   finishing off all there is in the water
   perch on land with their fins
   it's creepy
   how do we know they won't devour american houses?
   how do we know they won't devour american cars?
   this is definitely not the american eating habit"

   "how appalling, how do we know
   they aren't spies from the enemy camp, sent to collect
   intelligence under our horizon
   spread rumors of corporate fraud
   set off time bombs in markets
   unsettle the hearts of simple sincere citizens

   corrupt people's morals, cause divorce
   and ultimately seduce our people into believing pagan gods?"

   "how appalling, evidences prove
   these gluttons seriously affect our recreational activities
   the livelihood of commercial fishing; they must be seriously dealt
   with the minister of internal affairs announced, ban on Import
   people traveling with the fish will be jailed for six months
   customs will confiscate the fish and their eggs
   eradicate them for good, drive them to extinction, in short"

   "officers in maryland
   are consulting scientists to exterminate them
   with plans to poison the lakes
   put out promotional ads, tv programs and athletic uniform
   everyone passing through customs would have his shoes checked
   the military cancel their vacation to await order
   nuclear weapons, as rumour goes, will be deployed if necessary"

   "how appalling, we've to maintain
   the purity of our lakes, dignity of our great nation
   we've to eradicate these aliens that seriously threaten our ecology
   threaten our beliefs
   while the enemy is spreading rumor to confuse our hearts
   we have to deal a head-on pre-emptive blow
   declare war on the enemy at all cost!
   Declare war on the fish at all cost!"