Preparing Your Child for Dating

Adolescence, Spring, 2000

BARNES, Bob. Preparing Your Child for Dating. Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 1998. 208pp. $10.99 (p).

If there is one thing that parents dread about their child's teenage years, it is the prospect of dating. Some abdicate their responsibilities and let the child take the lead. Other parents tend to avoid the problem by ignoring it or opting for "courtship." But according to the author, the best scenario is parent-led dating. In Preparing Your Child for Dating, he explains how to open a healthy dialogue between teen and parent so that dating becomes a way to learn skills that will last a lifetime and that will become significant in marriage. He covers many areas, including why dating is important; how to teach the lessons of responsibility, purity, and safety; the roles of group, double, and single dating; and why curfews are important. Although some of the subjects, such as sexual issues, are difficult for parents to discuss, it is important for parents to make sure their child understands how they stand on certain issues and refuse to give in. At the same time, teens need to understand that their parents are concerned about their well-being and safety. That way, teens know that if they find themselves in difficult situations, they can call their parents for help; and if something bad does happen, they will know that their parents love them enough to listen and help.