How to Behave So Your Children Will, Too! - Review - book review

Adolescence, Spring, 2001

SEVERE, Sal. How to Behave So Your Children Will, Too! New York: Viking, 2000. 288pp. $23.95 (h).

Severe maintains that "children learn what they live--your children do as you do." Based on Severe's more than twenty years of experience as a school psychologist and parenting workshop leader, How to Behave So Your Children Will, Too! shows why a child's behavior is often a reflection of the parents' behavior, and how, by making changes themselves, parents can achieve dramatic results in their children. Instead of focusing on what children do wrong, this book teaches you what you can do right, by emphasizing the positive (reinforcing good behavior instead of criticizing your child), by being consistent (not giving in to misbehavior just to placate your child), and by being more patient, recognizing that children often operate on a different time schedule. It teaches you how to teach your children to behave, to listen--the first time--and to be more cooperative. It shows you how to manage your anger and how to prevent arguments and power struggles. Severe also provides concrete strategies for dealing with com mon problems: solving homework hassles, ending tantrums (especially in public places), avoiding the temptation to give in to your child when you are exhausted, creating reasonable rules for every age, and making sure to take time for children even when you and your spouse are working full time. These methods are well tested, and are inspired by stories and ideas that Severe has gleaned from parents in his workshops over many years.