The Lifestyle: A Look at the Erotic Rites of Swingers

Journal of Sex Research, May, 2001 by Richard Jenks

The Lifestyle: A Look at the Erotic Rites of Swingers. By Terry Gould. Buffalo, NY: Firefly Books, 1999, 392 pages. Paperback, $16.95.

Gould is a journalist who has taken on the challenge of writing about a topic that has escaped the notice of social scientists in the last two decades: swinging, or what some have come to call "the lifestyle." Not a swinger himself, Gould was introduced to the lifestyle in 1989 when he was assigned to write a magazine article on the swinging scene in Vancouver. In this current book, Gould does not break any new ground scientifically, but does chronicle and portray this sexual phenomenon while avoiding the common journalistic pitfall of labeling swingers as misfits or deviants. This relatively lengthy book provides an overview of the history and contemporary nature of swinging, an inside look at the lifestyle (at least as practiced in North America), and an examination of evolutionary considerations.

The book opens with an introduction to the lifestyle. Here the reader learns that there are 300 "formerly affiliated" swing clubs scattered over two dozen countries, and that in the 1950s journalists "discovered" swinging, referring to it as "wife swapping." Needless to say, this term conveys the image of using the wife as an object of exchange and is therefore not a term that is appreciated in the contemporary lifestyle. Gould also introduces the reader to some basic terminology, such as open swinging (sexual activity between newly formed couples in the same room) versus closed swinging (where the new couples go to separate rooms). Later the reader is informed of the ethics of the lifestyle, including the three primary rules of etiquette: (a) consideration for your spouse; (b) decency, which means you keep your hands to yourself unless invited to do otherwise; and (c) politeness (for example, going along with the woman's wishes as to using a condom).

Gould also considers the historical and cross-cultural study of group sex (referred to as orgiastic sex). The Greeks and Roman orgies are discussed along with the more common, discreet exchange of marital partners. The Innuits practiced partner exchange and some modern-day swingers, he avers, reciprocate sexual liaisons with favors. A second form of swinging consists of partner exchange with a few carefully chosen couples. They establish something of a clan. Some, such as the Toda of India, engage in casual sex while other types of swingers practice what Gould terms celebratory group sex. Few, however, appear to practice any kind of group marriage.

To fully understand the lifestyle, Gould considers one of the most important, if not the most important, individual in the swinging movement--Robert McGinley. It is McGinley who runs the North American Swing Club Association (NASCA) and the annual Lifestyles convention. Gould's chronicle of McGinley's rise to this position is both interesting and full of irony. A former aerospace engineer and boy scout troop leader, McGinley was raised a Nazarene Christian. A father of five who did not drink or curse, McGinley voted for Eisenhower. In the wake of disintegration in his marriage and religious faith, a job transfer to Japan served as a turning point. Returning home, Playboy replaced the Bible and his wife eventually filed for divorce. McGinley answered a swing ad and the rest, as they say, is history.

In 1968, McGinley met his future wife Geri at a party sponsored by the Sexual Freedom League. Together they formed Club World Wide and sponsored the first swing convention in 1973. This initial convention drew 125 people, even though it consisted of two days of lectures and only one social dance. In 1975, after obtaining his doctorate in counseling psychology, he and his wife formed Lifestyles, the group whose annual convention is now attended by thousands.

One of the more interesting aspects of the book is an insider's look at the conventions and some of the societal reactions to them. For example, one of the chapters focuses on problems McGinley faced with authorities while conducting the Lifestyles convention. The hotel where the convention was to be held was put on notice by the California Department of Alcoholic Beverage Control (ABC) that their liquor license was in jeopardy as a result of "lewdness" in conjunction with their Erotic Masquerade Ball. The ABC maintained that it would revoke the license if any infraction of the morals rules were witnessed by attending agents. Then the hotel informed McGinley that its 3-year contract was being terminated. Ironically, the Palm Springs Convention Bureau, unaware of ABC's involvement, informed McGinley that his convention was welcome in their city. The rest of the chapter deals with the legal machinations (including the involvement of the ACLU) and the subsequent victory for McGinley.

At one point, Gould and his wife travel to the Eden Resort in Mexico as one of thirty couples for a weekend of fun and sex. The reader is introduced to various swingers at the resort, practically all of whom are white-collar professionals. One such swinger, "Greer," expresses her conservative, Republican views by stating that "the drug dealers in her neighborhood should be executed." She states that what makes swinging acceptable is that the participants are "consenting adults." Gould considers why these "free and honest spirits" all were "in the closet" with regard to their swinging lifestyle. The answer, of course, is how society views swinging. Although many of Gould's interviewees wanted to talk about their trips and what transpired, they felt there would be negative repercussions for doing so. Certainly this mentality is warranted. Gould cites two different police raids of Canadian swing clubs, one which resulted in the arrest of 149 people. Gould also discusses the religious and Biblical aspects (for example, the story of Soddom and Gomorrah) of engaging in this "deviant" kind of sexuality.