Dial 'M' for mistake; nobody is perfect. But there is a point at which an acceptable number of errors simply becomes an unacceptable level of carelessness

Folio: The Magazine for Magazine Management, August, 1988 by Eliot Schein

Dial 'M' for mistake

* At first blush, M magazine's new business subscription direct mail piece, which mailed (among other times) during the first week of January 1988, seem like a pretty good-looking package.

Fairchild Publications' answer to Gentlemen's Quarterly has come a long way as an editorial product and as a circulation money maker. Especially valuable is the demography of the market. In fact, of its approximately 140,000 circulation, some 85,000 are subscribers--almost half of whom are from large urban centers.

An upscale magazine such as M deserves a sophisticated approach to circulation marketing, and surely that must have been the recommendation of Susan Lodge, who is M's publisher. Unfortunately, as is the case in many large publishing companies, the business of circulation promotion takes place in a centralized department far from the offices of the editors and publisher. Consequently, trouble can rear its ugly head if care is not taken. But let's look at the good news first.

The classy carrier envelope (which probably could have used a somewhat jazzier indicia) offers teaser copy that says, in rather large type, "A World of Difference for the Uncommon Man. . . ." This copy is gigantic and printed in loden green with little red triangles underlining the word "Difference." This is very artsy and results in an attractive 6" x 9" envelope.

The components inside are, for the most part, pretty sophisticated as well. The business reply envelope is a bit common for an "uncommon" package, but this slight weakness is more than offset by a dull-coated order from that bears the coopy, "An extraordinary offer for the uncommon man." Blending the headline on the carrier envelope with a follow-up headline (in the same color and style) on the order form makes a simple and easy transition. In fact, at this point, for the potential subscriber who is familiar with M, there might be no need for any other components--just the carrier and order form to sell subscriptions to this magazine.

If the customer has never heard of M, there is, fortunately, a dandy, 22-inch-long, four-color brochure that has a collection of photographs of so-called exotic subjects, including Michael Caine, a bowler hat, a London taxi, a young fellow sitting in a black turtleneck, oh, and there's some other stuff like more hats, some funny colored geese, a designer watch and what appears to be a foot soldier in battle garb! How this guy fits into this array is anybody's guess. All the same, there's no real problem with this brochure--it has impact, taste and drama. And, the copy reiterates the theme, "A World of Difference."

There's a second (or publisher's) letter "from" Tom O'Keefe, the circulation director. The letter reads in part, "It doesn't surprise me that you're hesitant about accepting. You obviously wouldn't have gotten this far in life without sniffing out the loopholes. In M's case, there simply aren't any."

Proofreading is key

Now we've come to the problem. In M's case, there are loopholes aplenty! Especially in the four-page letter. But more about that in a moment. The basic theme of this column is proofreading--the simple activity that helps to make writing readable, understandable and respectable. Now, make no mistake about it, this package is basically a fine example of the direct mail marketing craft. It's a shame it all falls apart when we get to the letter.

When shown this piece, Wally Bernheimer, CEO of Boston's Hub Mail Advertising and MASA (Mail Advertising Service Association), said, "It's nice package, but when you read the letter, it's another story." He continued, talking about the letter's typos, "This is absolutely amazing. I think our industry is populated with people who are inexperienced and don't know what they're doing."

Now we're not saying that typos don't happen. In fact, you've probably noticed you daily newspaper seems to have more typographical erros than it used to have. Yes, even the venerable New York Times Magazine section has produced more than one faux pas in type, grammar or syntax in the recent past. The things we have come to count on as being perfect seem to be disappearing quickly.

So who says that a direct mail package need be perfect? No one. But there is a limit to how much imperfection one can accept. In the very first sentence of the letter is the line, "It's easy to lose patience with the dull and drab, the phoney and foolish" Phoney is the less preferred spelling. The word is usually spelled phony, meaning not genuine, or false. Webster's New World Dictionary allows the spelling phoney, but also mentions that it might have something to do with "like a telephone."

Further down on the same page, sportscaster Jim McCay is mentioned. We're not so sure that Jim McKay would like that spelling of his name.

A line that comes right after the reference to McKay reads, "What British SAS Veteran John Wiseman advises if you crash-land in the Artic." No amount of second spelling or name changes on the part of sportscasters is going to make Artic mean anything other than Arctic.