Any Ol' Leonardo will do

NEA Today, Feb 1999

A third grade girl came into the media center and excitedly asked, "Mrs. Hall, do you have any books about Leonardo DiCaprio?"

"That heartthrob from Titanic?" I replied. "No, I'm sorry." The girl's head fell in despair. "Okay, where are your other biographies?" she asked.

I directed her to the biography section. In a few minutes, she approached the checkout counter with a book and sadly said, "Well, I guess this will have to do."

It was a book about Leonardo da Vinci. Marla Hall Prescott, Wisconsin

When I was teaching in a lab school on a college campus back in the 1970s, Nathan, one of my second graders, had some learning problems-and a great interest in war and disaster.

One day my student teacher-anxious to help him with subtraction and eager to impress measked, "Nathan, what would you have if you had seven airplanes and you lost three?"

Without a moment's hesitation, he replied, "A greatly reduced striking force." Linda Cookson Americus, Kansas

As we studied diversity, my fifth graders learned about concepts such as prejudice, stereotyping, and tolerance.

A few days later, we viewed a film in which an African-American boy was watched suspiciously and treated unfairly in a convenience store.

One of my students shouted out, "Hey, that's radiotyping!" Amy Kester Sun Valley, Nevada

Last year, for our school's "DrugFree Day," my kindergarten class had the theme, "Hats Off To Being Drug-Free." On that Friday, we all wore hats to school and gathered in the gym for a Stomp-Out to show how we stomp out drugs.

I explained to my students, without going into too much detail, that drugs were bad and that they should stay away from them.

At a conference the following week, one mother told me that when she asked her son what he learned that day, he replied, "Drugs are free on Fridays, Mom!"

Obviously not the message I intended. Jackie Dula Bound Brook, New Jersey

After an exciting day at the fair, my fourth graders and I were discussing all the animals we had seen, especially the rabbits.

One of my eager boys proceeded up to the front of the room to show everyone his rabbit pelt. I asked him how he got the pelt.

He explained, "They shaved it off the bunny."

To which another boy shouted, "I wonder how much shaving cream they had to use!" Jenny Egly Spokane, Washington

Since students in one of my reading classes were preparing to take the written driver's permit test, we had been reading and discussing the driver's manual.

I asked a student to read a sentence about yielding to pedestrians. He read, "When Presbyterians are in a crosswalk...."

I asked him what he was supposed to do if there was a Baptist in a crosswalk.

Carol Carney Harrodsburg, Kentucky

Recently, a student failed to get a note signed by his mother-who was expecting a baby.

When I told him I would need to call her, he replied, "You won't be able to get her today. She's going into the hospital this morning because they're going to seduce her." Sue Muffo Blacksburg, Virginia

MY second grade music class was singing a song about the many ways to say hello. We then brainstormed a good list, including bonjour, aloha, and ciao.

We were just about finished adding to our list when a hand shot up in the air. A boy with a wide smile said, "I can say hello in cursive!" Jane Herth Alexandria, Minnesota

While taking with my fourth graders about interests outside of school, I explained that I work as an EMT (emergency medical technician) for our local ambulance service.

Later, I heard one of my students tell her mother, "Did you know Mr. Dodge works at a bank on weekends?"

Surprised, her mother questioned her. The student replied, "He's an ATM !"

Christopher Dodge Greensboro, Vermont

A colleague of mine asked her first grade students if they knew what a vowel was.

One little fellow raised his hand and said, "I don't know what it is, but I know you can buy them on `Wheel of Fortune."' Joan Ramo Caribou, Maine