Two wheels good, four wheels bad

Spectator, The, Aug 16, 2003 by Johnson, Boris

X is for XAVIERA Hollander, who has no place in this guide except that she is, or was, a bit of a bicycle in her own way.

Y is for YELLOW LIGHT, and the ancient dilemma. When you spot one of these 20 yards out, do you give it some welly, and scoot across just before the first motorbike can knock you over? Or do you play safe, and rest your left foot on the kerb, and have a breather?

Z is for ZOOM, which is what you had better do if you decide to go for it, and I cannot, in all conscience, recommend that you do. Be safe, my friends.