Teaching kids to discern

Group, Nov/Dec 1999 by Updegraff, Roberta

a veteran youth leader's savvy strategy for helping kids learn to evaluate the underlying messages in popular films, TV shows, and music

"I was wondering about a song I heard on MTV," confided a teen. age girl in my group. "It seems Christian, but... something just doesn't feel right."

I'm sure you know the music video she was talking about: Joan Osbourne's haunting song, "One of Us" The song filters life through a bleak lens: "What if God was one of us. Just a slob like one of us. Just a stranger on the bus trying to make his way home."

After I watched the video, my heart ached for Osbourne-and for all the young people roaming aimlessly down dead-end paths. My passion is to reach these teenagers with the good news that God is not only one of us, but lives in the hearts of believers today. The best way to do that, I reasoned, is to help kids learn how to ingest popular culture using critical biblical filters.

So, with trepidation and prayer, I designed a strategy for critical viewing using a set of probing questions as a springboard for thoughtful discussion.

We used "One of Us"

for our first experiment in biblical media discernment. As a catalyst for spiritual dialogue, I quickly realized how powerful biblically grounded media critique could be in kids' lives.

That first experience made me want to do more. But I was hesitant-I felt unsure about leading my youth group deeper into the Hollywood mire. But the visual media have an undeniable impact on the way our kids think and act. And if the church denies that impact by refusing to lead kids into biblical discussions about the Christ-less ideas they download every day, we're guilty of spiritual neglect.

I went to the Bible for help. Jesus commissioned his disciples by saying, "I am sending you out like sheep among wolves. Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves." Shrewd as snakeswhat a comparison! I made up my mind: With God's guidance, we would meet the Serpent on his own turf.

1. Snakes are cautious, patient, and sure. That means our forums for critical critique must not degenerate into a license for reckless viewing. So I preview the films and videos we're thinking about targeting, and I ask for parents' input. We choose movies that have subtle humanistic threads or that sentimentalize controversial issues, luring viewers to embrace a certain viewpoint. We also require a signed release form from kids' parents for our movie nights (it's designed to look like a movie theater pass).

I discourage our young people from watching questionable films on their own. Instead, I urge them to view movies with their parents-not alone or with friends. And we begin each session with prayer and Scripture-reading, giving ourselves a biblical foundation before we immerse ourselves in the media quagmire.2

2. Snakes stay true to themselves. Before viewing anything, we open ourselves to the Holy Spirit, asking God to give us eyes to see as he does. Then we remind one another to be fair and loving-no fingerwagging or holier-than-thou remarks allowed.

Afterward I encourage kids who plan to talk about the film with their not-yet-Christian friends to do it with love and sensitivity. Their mission is not to condemn the film, but to ask thought-provoking questions that gently lead seekers to examine their own beliefs.

3. Snakes avoid danger. I've decided that some movies and TV shows are just too dangerous for viewing. We don't critique anything with more than a PG-13 rating. And we don't use anything explicitly sexual or violent. Because I preview all the films, I can skip objectionable scenes or choose only certain clips from risque or intense movies when we're critiquing as a group.

4. Snakes are deadly accurate. Pythons have heat sensors on their lips to detect prey, so when they strike they seldom miss. I always know where I'd like to head with our critique discussion, and I gently guide kids in that direction by encouraging them to think hard and research their arguments.3 If someone throws out a statistic or a "factual" statement about something, we ask for sources. I often play devil's advocate to help them to clarify their positions.

For example, here's how we approached Titanic (some of our kids saw this movie a half-dozen times)...

I asked, "What is it about this movie that draws millions of kids back to it again and again?"

"It's an emotional high," remarked one girl.

"It's about true love," crooned another.

"Unconditional love," another sighed.

I asked: "Unconditional love? Can you tell me what you mean?" This question opened kids' emotional floodgates. They explained that divorce, remarriage, and the parental quest for "a better life" had left them feeling alienated, lost, and alone.

"Just like Rose (the heroine)," one young person said, "we all want to have someone who loves us best of all. Someone we can trust with our very lives."

I silently prayed that my teenagers and their friends would find their "someone" in God. Then we launched into a discussion on how to introduce Jesus to their friends.