Bible studies

Group, May/Jun 2001 by Trujillo, Kelli

READYTOGO

sex

For Guys and Girls; For Girls Only; For Guys Only; and For Guys, Girls, Moms, and Dads

for guys and girls

1. Mixed Messages-(You'll need four pieces of poster board and markers.)

When kids arrive, form four mixedgender groups and give each group a marker and a poster-board piece with one of the following phrases written at the top: Losing Virginity, Making Love, Messing Around, Having Sex.

Instruct the groups to brainstorm and list words or phrases that describe our culture's perspective on their topic, using the following questions as sparks: How is it depicted in movies and on TV? How would your peers at school describe it? What's the typical age of the people involved? What's the setting? What emotions are involved? What's the commitment level?

When kids finish, ask them to flip their posters over and do the same thing, but this time brainstorm from the perspective of the church. -> Ask: In general, what messages do you get from Christian adults, pastors, parents, videos, magazines, radio shows, or music on your topic?

When finished, invite each group to explain both sides of their posters to the rest of the groups. Then -> ask: When it comes to sexual issues, what's wrong and what's right about the culture's perspective? about the church's perspective? How do you determine what's right and wrong? Why is there so much disagreement between the culture's perspective on sex and the church's perspective on it?

2. Sex at Its Best-(You'll need Bibles.)

Ask for three volunteers to describe God's perspective on sex. Then give each group the following Scripture passages to read aloud: Genesis 2:22-24; Song of Songs 1:2-4, 15-16; 2:7, 16; 5:16; 8:6. Then ask groups to -> discuss: What surprised you about what you read? Why? How would you finish this sentence: "God created sex to be __?" What are the differences between the Bible's perspective on sex and the culture's? What role does God want sexuality to play in our lives? Is it a positive thing? a negative thing? both? Explain.

3. Out of Its Element-(You'll need a fish in a fishbowl, and a small fishnet.)

Before the study, borrow a fish, a fishbowl, and a small fishnet and set them on a table in your meeting room.

-> Say: God created this fish for a particular environmentwater. It can breathe, it can swim, and it looks beautiful.

-> Ask: What will happen to the fish if I take it out of the water?

Use the fishnet to briefly hold the fish out of the water for the teenagers to see. Point out that the fish can live for a short time out of the water, but it's out of its element. It can't breathe, it can't swim, and eventually it will die-in the wrong environment the fish can't thrive.

-> Ask: How would you describe the environment God created sex to thrive in? What makes it thrive in that setting?

-> Say: When sex is taken out of the environment God created it for-a committed marriage relationship-it can become twisted, painful, and destructive. Like the fish out of water, premarital sex often doesn't have an immediate negative impact-but it's only a matter of time.

Close by praying that God's desires for sexuality would be lived out in your kids' lives.

for girls only

1. The Sexiness Spectrum--(You'll need several teen or women's magazines, scissors, masking tape, self-stick notes, and pens or pencils.)

Invite girls to look through magazines and cut out pictures that contain messages about sex or romance. Then have them each show one or two of their pictures and explain what they think the message is.

Then -> say: One wall in our room will represent a continuum-the far left side is for sexual messages that are immoral in God's eyes, the middle ir-for sexual messages that are neutral or "not that bad,' and the right side is for ideas about sex that line up with God's desires.

Have kids tape their pictures where they think they belong on the wall. Then give them each a supply of self-stick notes and and a pencil or pen.

-> Say: On each self-stick note, write one other sexual message or behavior, then add the notes to the continuum on the wall.

Have girls walk the length of the wall looking at the pictures and self-stick notes. Then -> ask: Of all the ideas and messages we've discussed, which are the most commonly accepted? Why? How can ideas such as the ones on the left side of the spectrum affect the way you think or behave?

2. Dangers and Darkness-(You'll need flashlights and Bibles.)

Have girls form pairs or trios and read aloud Ephesians 5:1-11, 15-17. Challenge them to pick out phrases or ideas in the passages that describe common romantic relationships.

Pass out flashlights and ask girls to shine them on the left end of the spectrum. Then turn off the lights in the room and -> say: God makes a clear distinction between living in the light and doing deeds of darkness. As we look at the immoral message about sexuality on the wall, I'd like each of you to think of one good reason to not live that way. As you say your idea, turn off your flashlight.

Once all the girls have shared and turned off their flashlights, -> ask: How is sitting in this darkness similar to denying or ignoring God's desires in how we express our sexuality? When we buy into false ideas about sexuality, what are some likely consequences?

3. Living As Light-(You'll need flashlights, Bibles, a scented candle, matches, and self-stick notes.)

Ask girls to turn their flashlights back on and reread Ephesians 5:1-11, 15-17. Have them look for all of the positive phrases in the passage that could describe what it's like to follow God in the area of sex and romance. While they're reading, set out a lighted scented candle.

-> Say: God's Word tells us to live as children of the light and as fragrant offerings, without a hint of sexual immorality. How can you choose to live as a fragrant offering to God?