Hands on help: Adults

Group, Jul/Aug 2003 by Akers, Tony

memory quilts ADULTS

If your youth ministry has accumulated a large collection of promotional T-shirts over the years, you have the raw material for a great memory-builder that will connect older church members with youth group members.

Gather one of every kind of T-shirt connected to your youth ministry. For example, summer camp, lock-ins, mission trips, youth conventions, concerts, and any other special events.

Enlist church members to help the teenagers create a simple quilt by cutting out 10- or 12-inch squares of the logo or artwork from each T-shirt and then sewing them together for a memorable wall hanging.

y-files ADULT LEADERS

A portable filing box with a labeled folder inside for each of your adult leaders gives everyone a quick-and-easy point of connection.

Use the folders to file pertinent youth ministry information, articles of interest to specific adult leaders, notes of affirmation, and so on. If you place the file where teenagers also have access, they can add material for adult leaders as well. For example, thank you notes or information about school or community events that they're involved in. Remind adult leaders to check the Y-file on a regular basis.

double gap PARENTS

The acronym G.A.P. forms the basis for a simple but effective way to structure a program for parents of youth group members.

Gather And Pray-Once a month, during the time the youth group meets, have parents gather at one home to pray for the youth ministry, the teenagers, all the parents, and all the leaders who are working with the kids.

Gather As Parents-Once a quarter, invite parents to meet to discuss issues related to youth ministry activities, culture, and paranting. To encourage discussion, provide parents with copies of youthculture@today from the Center for Parent/Youth Understanding (www.cpyu.org). As alternative discussion starters, copy the Trendwatch section of group Magazine or download The Home Page, group's newsletter for parents. just go to www.groupmag.com and click on The Home Page.

how to get your teen to talk to you REVIEW

What it is: Connie Grigsby and Kent julian have created a "scrapbook" of strategies for improved communication between parents and teenagers. This isn't another resource that teaches one how to talk "to" teenagers, but instead one that instructs how to talk "with" them-a difference that separates this book from many others on the subject.

The scoop: The authors have put together 52 easily readable and practical chapters (conveniently one per week) that guide parents in the art of communication across generations. Grigsby and julian manage to avoid overwhelming a reader with their insights or moving them to guilt about past failures. Instead, one walks away from each chapter with a sense of "I can do that!" The book certainly doesn't address every issue related to parent/teen communication, nor does it delve into clinical analysis of the problem. Rather, it provides caring parents of normal teenagers with the necessary tools to bridge the gap. If you love teenagers, but sometimes struggle with knowing how to communicate, this resource should be in your hands.

Cost: $10.99

Available from: Multnomah Publishers, 800-929-0910, 800-263-2664 (Canada).

Reviewer Tony Akers has 14 years of ministry experience.

relational commitment cards ADULT LEADERS

Use this affirmation activity to jump-start a discussion with your adult leaders on the importance of being a relationship-oriented youth ministry.

You'll need a 3x5 card for each adult leader. At the top of each card, write the name of a volunteer, then list three things you appreciate or value about that person. On the back of each card, draw a line down the center. On the left side, list the numbers 1, 2, and 3. On the righthand side, write, "I would like to see you be more relationship-oriented with our students."

As you hand out the cards at your next meeting, tell everyone that you've written on the front of the cards things you really appreciate about them; and on the back of the cards, something you want each person to work on. Give people the cards with the nameside up, and ask them not to turn the cards over until you tell them to do so.

Ask each person to read out loud at least one affirmation from his or her card. Then have them all turn their cards over, and ask a few volunteers to read what's written. They'll be surprised when they realize all the cards say the same thing. Then pull out a card for yourself with the statement written on it as well. This makes a great lead-in for a conversation on how all of you might work on building relationships with the young people in your youth ministry.

Call attention to the numbers listed on the back of the cards, and give people the assignment to find three kids in the next month that they haven't talked to before and make connections with them.