8 WAYS TO KILL THE BUNNY

Group, Jul/Aug 2005 by Tucker, Jason

* Ask the ladies in your church's "sewing circle" if they'd make protective arm covers for the chairs in your youth room. Have them show up at your regular youth group meeting and prepare your kids beforehand to shower them with love and appreciation-it's all about connection.

4. SPEND AS MUCH TIME CULTIVATING RELATIONSHIPS WITH PARENTS AS YOU DO WITH THEIR TEENAGERS.

I know the hows and whys of parent ministry have been debated often. "It's not in my job description," I hear many youth workers say. "And isn't our job to minister to youth? If I expand my focus to parents, that will sidetrack me from my calling." These are valid issues, but here's the truth: Ministry to parents is ministry to teenagers. Search Institute's "Predictors of a Mature Faith" study found two factors that primarily fuel an integrated, committed faith in young people-teenagers who "talk about faith with their mother" and "talk about faith with their father." Simply, parents are the key to kids' spiritual growth.

* Plan parents-only parties. Create a relaxed environment to start building relationships. Our paths mostly intersect when they're in "busy-parent mode." Give them the gift of space so they can catch their breath and make natural connections with you and your leaders.

* Plan a family Bible-study series (maybe over the summer break). Focus on generating conversations between parents and kids about faith basics. Some parents have never talked about their faith with their teenagers, and they desperately want someone to show them how. Start by asking them to explain to their kids why they love Jesus-you'd be surprised by how many parents have never done this!

* Actively recruit parents to join your kids on mission trips, camp experiences, and retreats. When parents are plunged into shared spiritual experiences with their teenagers, they'll start to understand why these events work and why it's worth the sacrifice to make sure their teenagers attend. A parent who understands what you're trying to do will support you faithfully and passionately.

5. IF YOU STAIN THE CARPET, CLEAN IT UP.

Sure, it's a clichéd complaint. But clichés reach that status because there's truth in them. It's ridiculous to think things won't break or spills will never occur in youth ministry. But like it or not, some people judge the value of what you're doing based on its appearance, and if it appears your teenagers don't care about the church facilities, you'll undermine their support.

* Encourage your kids to make a name for themselves churchwide by cleaning up after themselves. Adopt the camping dictum: "We leave the room better than we found it." This will not only teach them a valuable lesson but also give you time to discuss more important things at your next performance review.

* If you break it, offer to buy it. Your budget is probably small, like mine, but your offer to purchase whatever your kids break will communicate volumes about your sensitivity to others' priorities.

6. MAINTAIN A BASIC LEVEL OF ORGANIZATION-ENOUGH TO FOOL THE REST OF THE CHURCH INTO THINKING IT'S ONE OF YOUR STRENGTHS.