Joan of Arc Meets Mary Poppins: Maternal Re-nurturing Approaches with Male Patients in Ego-State Therapy

American Journal of Clinical Hypnosis,  Jul 2004  by Phillips, Maggie

• E-mail
• Print
• Link

Yet another focus in this area has been the application of hypnotic suggestion to facilitate the use of transitional experiences. Baker (1994) has proposed that, for more disturbed psychotic patients, the hypnotic experience can serve as a container and that the hypnotherapist can act as a transitional object, helping to promote the growth of more mature defenses and the completion of important developmental tasks. Morton and Frederick (1997) and Phillips (1997b) have applied these concepts in relation to ego states. They have explored how the therapist can provide transitional experiences for less mature ego states, as well as how more developed personality states can serve in this capacity for less developed ones.

Gender Differences

The area of gender differences has recently been suggested as an important consideration in the design of hypnotic interventions, particularly in the area of women's health care and in empowering women in their management and mastery of somatic symptoms (Hornyak & Green, 2000; Mutter, 1999). Although less has been written about the issue of male needs in the hypnotic process, Hornyak (1999) points out several important gender differences that are germane to the topic of this paper. The first is that interpersonal intimacy is the central organizer of female experience and the key to understanding women's "different voice" (Jack, 1991). She suggests that for women, differentiation of the self occurs by developing their own abilities within the framework of relationships. This is in contrast to the more traditional developmental model of separating from relationship in order to individuate (Hornyak, 1999), which more typically governs the needs of men in our culture.

Hornyak (1999) further reminds us that gender differences in strengths and vulnerabilities arise from the different social contexts and norms that affect male and female development. While females may tend to disconnect within themselves in order to keep important relational connections, men may tend to disconnect more from relationships in order to express and experience their strengths.

Clinical Cases

In this paper, I begin to examine the implications of these differences in the area of ego-state therapy focused on re-nurturing and self-reparenting experiences with male patients. Two clinical examples are presented to illustrate the relevance of gender differences related to these tasks and how they may be utilized in hypnotic contexts. Both cases involve male patients who have experienced significant trauma in early attachment relationships with women and who subsequently develop central difficulties with intimate relationships with women in their adult lives.

Case 1: Alex

Alex, a 41-year-old professional, grew up in a family where his mother was depressed, withdrawn, and largely unavailable during his formative years. His father was intrusive and angry at Alex's dependency needs related to his mother, and abusive in later childhood when Alex's anger about his unmet needs began to explode in selfdestructive and acting-out behavior. Alex had one sibling, an older sister, who served as a surrogate mother figure in his early life, but abruptly rejected him as her own needs for autonomy and stronger peer relationships took precedence. Alex had a difficult time in school and, during high school, was sent to boarding school where he excelled. After his sister left home for college in his junior year, however, he returned to his hometown to live at home during his senior year. all of his adult relationships with women had been disappointing to him. He described women generally as not knowing how to meet his intense needs to be seen, understood, and supported. His intimacy patterns had typically resulted in his female partners becoming depressed regarding their inadequacies in meeting his needs and deciding to end the relationship, or his becoming increasingly angry and disappointed in their ineffectiveness with him, and making the decision to leave.