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Industry: Email Alert RSS FeedINTERACTIVE WORK PLACE TRAUMA (IWPT)/TRAUMATISME INTERACTIF EN MILIEU DE TRAVAIL (TIMT)
Canadian Operating Room Nursing Journal, Jun 2005 by Shewchuk, Muriel
Victims
Victims of bullying, or horizontal violence, will quickly become more insecure, may blame themselves for errors or incompetence, lose self-esteem, and frequently question their personal abilities. Sleep patterns are the first to be disrupted by the stress. Victims also experience a "fear of facing Monday", first calling in to see who they are working with, or just calling in sick to avoid going to work. Visible responses may show up as anger, crying, sitting alone withdrawn, and signs of nervousness. Physical problems may include hypertension and sleep deprivation right up to more serious psychological problems such as depression and even suicidal tendencies. Remaining in a position that involves constant abuse will ultimately have long-lasting negative results for the victim. The victim may just leave the job, without identifying the real reason, and leave the power brokers with another success. Tackling the bully is a highly threatening and dangerous tactic.
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Dealing with the Bully - When you are the Victim
* Educate yourself on bullying, recognize it for what it is, know it and name it. It is important to realize that it is not about you or you can be taken over by the "victim mentality". Be very clear that you are dealing with a bully and that it is their problem - NOT yours- do not let the transfer of responsibility occur. Do a thorough reading of abuse and harassment policies. Research on the Internet and read appropriate books.
* Document, document, document. Be very specific in your recording: names, dates, situation, exact words, actions and observers' names. Be very objective and try to keep the emotion out of your records. Protect your documentation; keep it at home with only today's notes in your pocket. Add to your permanent documentation as soon as possible to maintain facts and accuracy. Record detailed observations when others are being attacked or treated inappropriately. You need to establish and to document the pattern of behaviour.
* Use extreme caution when responding to questions or commands that can progress to making the bully right. Siding with them on an issue is very high risk. Evasive, non-committal, non-confrontational, brief answers are best for keeping you outside their control. Use straight facts and truth when responding. Keep unrelated information and opinions out of the conversation.
* Obtain counseling and medical attention that is appropriate to your needs so that you can effectively manage your situation. Maintain good health and plenty of restful sleep.
* Complaints, grievances and lawsuits can be filed. If going down this road you need to be sure your documentation is extensive, that the correct process is used, and that you have the strength to see it through. Make sure you have plenty of emotional support as it can be very stressful. This is NOT an easy option!
* Once you have educated yourself about bullying, use you knowledge help others and to stop this outrageous social abuse.
* Ask yourself if the job is worth it. If after thorough examination you decide it is not, then make sure you give the appropriate management effective and truthful notice. Make sure you have a good reference, insist on an exit interview with the manager and with Human Resources. File a letter stating the real reason for your departure and identify the facts of the situation. Keep opinion and emotion out of it.
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