What's this? Shed-loads of women have, er, sheds RESUME: THE GARDEN

0 Comments | Sunday Herald, The, Mar 27, 2005 | by Jenifer Johnston

Feminism rears its ugly head again . . .

It's 2005: sheds are a space for all.

Yes, it seems so - what happened to a man's shed being his castle?

It's high time women had their fair share of the shed - a survey of 1000 adults released last week found that 40per cent of women now regard their shed as a space where they can "do their own thing", compared to 38per cent of men.

What kind of 'thing' are we talking about?

Just . . . stuff. Listening to the radio.

Fixing broken chairs. Organising drill bits into plastic containers. Ignoring your other half screaming "phone for you!"

from the house. Dreaming about having a shed in the Caribbean. Just . . . stuff.

I can feel an "expert" opinion coming on . . .

Ta da! Tom Greatrex of the Future Laboratory carried out the survey, and he said that because women are living more like men, apparently spending more time pottering in the shed makes perfect sociological sense.

Women have of course been encouraged to invest in a shed after a decade of mind-numbing DIY and gardening programmes (although most people watched Ground Force to see Charlie Dimmock's Boobs vs Gravity).

Is that is it?

Drum roll please for Tom Greatrex:

"We're seeing a move away from the No, Lorian Coutts of B&Q, has this nugget of wisdom: "With women acting as the major catalysts and decisionmakers behind many home improvement projects, we are not surprised by this trend, especially as the range of products encompasses sophisticated garden buildings with a range of luxury features."

True - sheds seem to have gone all fancy. A lot of them have windows, built-in heating, their own patios, en suite bathrooms . . .

open-plan space and a return to creating dens, 'ideas pits' and boltholes.

"There is a recession round the corner that we're preparing to weather out in the comfort of our own homes and also in the increasing comfort of our garden sheds." He says he's seen mini- spas, meditation rooms, studios and outside bars in modern sheds.

What about the long tradition of men hiding in sheds working on 'important projects'?

Ah, you sneer, but listen to this: Scot James Augustus Henry Murray, the first editor of the Oxford English Dictionary (originally the New English Dictionary) who held the post from 1878 until his death in 1915, edited more than half the dictionary single- handed, working in a shed in his back garden nicknamed the Scriptorium.

Louis de Bernieres wrote Captain Corelli's Mandolin in a wooden summer house in Norfolk. And Philip Pullman wrote the His Dark Materials trilogy in his shed.

But surely these new-stylee shed palaces are for play, not work?

Think of this: having a nice shed can add up to 5per cent to the value of your home. Over one and a half million were built last year in the UK, with sales up 40per cent in the last two years. And there's even a new word for people that like sheds . . .

Which is?

Shedite. Although shed die-hards would disagree and say the proper term is sheddie (www. readerssheds. co. uk). Not to be confused with cardboard-like breakfast cereal Shreddies. Chav users of said facilities are bound to become known as shed-neds.

I can't help hearing the Divine Comedy singing: 'There's something in the woodshed, and I can hear it breathing . . .'

Oooh, nasty!