Casual teen sex not the problem

Oakland Tribune, Feb 26, 2005

THIS LETTER is in response to your article on teen sex (Feb. 22).

I am an adviser to a youth rights group in Berkeley. While I acknowledge that STDs are on the rise, I don't believe for one second that teen sex is the problem. I would instead shift the blame to society's attempts to drive this behavior underground.

A minister I recently spoke to characterized his attitude close to: "That is adult behavior, and if you're going to do it, you should be an adult about it." Well, Reverend, I've got news for you: It's not stopping, and your ignorance of the issue is only making problems worse.

I believe that if youths had freer and less "shameful" access to birth control, the problem would slowly abate. I also believe that acknowledging youths as sexual beings would add to a solution. I feel your article misses the basic premise of the problem.

Svend la Rose

San Leandro

Some old songs

not old enough

REGARDING THE ARTICLE "Love: on the record" (Feb. 14):

The reporter is right on when he says that the old songs reflect love much better than the new ones. The only problem is that his "old songs" aren't old enough. Relying on SIRIUS satellite radio automatically biases the choice toward those of younger people.

Try checking with those of us on the far side of 60 or so. Even the same songs sound different, such as "Unchained Melody." The Righteous Brothers obviously didn't know the melody and kept searching for it -- try listening to either the Roy Hamilton or Al Hibbler versions from 1955. And the Etta James rendition of "At Last" reminds me of someone dragging their fingernails across a chalkboard compared to the velvety-smooth 1940 Glenn Miller recording.

Younger people should try listening to those really old songs -- they might discover lyrics they can sing, melodies they can hum, and the other thing missing from so much of modern music: romance!

Chuck Brady

Hayward

Internet dating

takes sense

ITRIED USING Yahoo Personals back when they were free, in 1997 (Flying Solo, Feb. 20).

At first I was very overwhelmed by the responses I was getting. I was weeding through and responding to the "good ones," deleting the weirdos and was spending three hours a night. It became too much like work!

I had a criteria of how to handle myself, as the Internet is a tool only and you need a lot of common sense. The potential for totally deceiving another person was immense. I e-mailed for two weeks or so, talked on the phone, then arranged a meeting in a very public place. If that worked out, we tried a date -- just a movie or concert or something.

By this time you have pretty much already come to a conclusion about this person. I met someone very nice, in my home town (one of my criteria). We started dating seven years ago, moved in together four years ago and married in 2003. So there are some happy endings.

Just never give out your address to a complete stranger! That person may be a stalker -- or worse.

Rhonna Marsden

Fremont

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