Group for gay, lesbian seniors comes to Fremont

0 Comments | Oakland Tribune, Sep 21, 2006 | by Chris De Benedetti, STAFF WRITER

FREMONT -- As a lesbian living today in Fremont, Bobbie Jarvis has few complaints of overt discrimination.

It is quite a contrast to life in her home state of Oklahoma in the 1950s, when she was afraid to be herself.

Even in the San Francisco of that era, lesbians sometimes were targeted by either police or violent gangs, said Jarvis, 72.

Although times have changed, painful memories of similar discrimination often linger in the minds of aging gay and lesbian seniors. Those remembrances, coupled with the sense of vulnerability that commonly afflicts seniors, sometimes push elderly gay people back into the closet and out of arm's reach from essential social services.

Lavender Seniors of the East Bay wants to change that.

The San Leandro-based nonprofit is hosting a free lunch at noon Friday at the Fremont Senior Center to reach out to gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people ages 55 and older.

"We really want to get to (gay) seniors in southern Alameda County because they haven't been very comfortable coming out to an organized activity," said Barbara Faulkner, executive director of Lavender Seniors. "We can help them connect to resources they need, or introduce them to seniors like them."

The organization also offers information that may help them deal with health, legal or social issues. Lavender Seniors has been providing these services around the East Bay since it formed in 1994.

But Friday's event marks its first official foray into the Tri- City area.

"We have been wanting to do something in Fremont for some time," Faulkner said. "Statistics tell us thatmany of their (gay and lesbian) seniors are underserved."

The organization has been working with Mary Anne Mendall, administrator of Aging and Family Services in Fremont's Human Services Department, to make the senior center lunches a monthly event. "(Lavender Seniors) bring another perspective that hopefully will enrich everyone," Mendall said.

Ina Mae Murri, 71, has lived in Fremont for 15 years with her partner. A Lavender Seniors advisory board member with Jarvis and seven others, Murri praised the Tri-City area for its compassion. "I don't think we have been discriminated against either as an older person or as a lesbian," she said.

However, some have not been as fortunate.

"We're looking for seniors who are isolated and we match them up with volunteers who visit them or help them do mundane things, like going to a grocery store," Murri said.

Jarvis, who has been in a relationship for 32 years, said she will attend Friday's lunch at the Senior Center, 40086 Paseo Padre Parkway. Like Murri, Jarvis said she and her partner today feel very comfortable living in Fremont as a lesbian couple.

"You kind of get back what you cast upon the waters," she said. "We have a full slate of straight and gay friends. Having an extended family helps."

Staff writer Chris De Benedetti covers Fremont issues. He can be reached at (510) 353-7002 or cdebenedetti@angnewspapers.com.